True Academy
by schillingklaus
Summary: Lulu, Ryan, and True go to Pacific Coast for middle school.  Follows a modified storyline of Zoey 101.


**True Academy**

**Klaus Schilling**

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**Rating**

PG-13

**Disclaimer**

I don't own _Zoey 101_, _True Jackson VP_, or any other show or work of arts.

**Description**

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**Fandoms**:

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initially _Zoey 101_ plus _True Jackson VP_, but many other similar-fashioned _Nickelodeon_ shows will chime in.

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******Genres**:

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massively multiplot melodramatic novel — Fluff, Family, Friendship, Mystery …

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******Summary**:

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True, Ryan, and Lulu come to PCA for middle school. Follows the story line of _Zoey 101_, modified by the interference of the trio of _True Jackson VP_.

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******People**:

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Louise Johnson–Dustin Brooks, about everyone and his dog from _Zoey 101_, many people from _True Jackson VP_, various people from _The iCarly Show_, _Drake & Josh_, _Ned__'__s Declassified School Survival Guide_, _Unfabulous_, _Victorious_, _Bigtime Rush_

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******Timeline**:

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starts with first season _Zoey 101_, _Ned__'__s Declassified School Survival Guide_, _Unfabulous_, second season _Drake & Josh_, pre-canon elsewhere

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**Background**

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The story is written for _LiveJournal_-Community _Crossovers50_, claim _Pacific Coast Academy_, prompt _Sunny_

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**Contents**

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Part I First Season

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Chapter 1 Pilot

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Chapter 2 True Inventions

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Chapter 3 True Or Daring

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Chapter 4 True Commercial

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Chapter 5 True Theatre

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Chapter 6 True Party

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Chapter 7 True Enemy

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Chapter 8 True Dance Partner

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Part II Second Season

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Chapter 9 True Power

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Chapter 10 True Class President

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Chapter 11 True Jealousy

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Chapter 12 True Technology Freaks

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Chapter 13 True Love

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Chapter 14 True Spring Break

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Chapter 15 True Mount

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Part III Third Season

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Chapter 16 True Consternation

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Chapter 17 True Jocks

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Chapter 18 True Insanity

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Chapter 19 True Vendor Machines

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Chapter 20 True Scream

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Chapter 21 True Radio

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Chapter 22 True Genius

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Part IV Fourth Season

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Chapter 23 True Legend

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Chapter 24 True Customer

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Chapter 25 True Talent

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Chapter 26 True Barbecue

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Chapter 27 True Touch

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Chapter 28 True Cupsize

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Chapter 29 True Offers

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Chapter 30 True Conclusions

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**Part I  
First Season**

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**Chapter 1 Pilot**

Hello, my name is Louise Johnson.

But I would hate it if you called me like this.

Instead, call me Lulu!

Years ago, still being eleven years old, I was on the way from cold, grey New York City across the continent to Los Angeles. I was not alone.

My best friend True Jackson was by side, just like our annoying common friend Ryan Laserbeam.

The van was steered by Ryan's elder brother Stuart.[1:1]

Stuart was a senior at the boarding school we were bound for in order to start middle school. He had always been the pride of the Laserbeam clan. He was going to business school and become a great CEO, or that's what everyone expected.

Our trip's goal, the _Pacific Coast Academy_, had just been opened for girls.

It had not been easy to convince my dad into sending me hereto, but when he heard that the teachers are the best of the whole nation, he changed his mind.

My little brother[1:2] Leroy was also on board.

Finally, True's little cousin Jack[1:3] had been a student here for two years already. This made things easier. He was going to expect us on the campus.

The trip had been like hell, we had to make three breaks on camping sites.

My bladder hurt like hellfire when we left the car.

Jack came along,and he huggled the hell out of True.

True smiled. 'Hi Jack! Will you help us find Farrow Hall?'[1:4]

Jack smiled. 'Good news, Leroy is my roomie…'

My brother smiled. 'Yeah!'

Jack grabbed Leroy. 'Come with me! Our roomie Dustin is already waiting for us!'

And off they were.

I sighed with despair. 'He has promised to help me ith my luggage.'

True chuckled. 'Come on, we will make it on our own.'

I sighed.

All of a sudden, Ryan was gone.

'Have you seen that,' wondered flabbergasted True.

Stuart shrugged. 'He must have seen one of our cheerleader girls.'

True and I sighed.

Stuart guided us to the entrance of our dormitory buildings. 'I have a lot of things to do. See you in the cafeteria.'

We had come past there on our way to the dormitory block, so we knew where that was. Left alone, True and I had no choice but getting our own business done.

And it was time for me to discharge my exploding bladder.

1 Farrow Hall… this was our dorm.

We sweated.

The red hot Californian sun was going to cause us a lot of troubles, as nice as it was when compared to New York City.

Now we dumped our suitcases.

Startled by the noise, a blonde bounded in. 'It's you?' She was consternated.

True and I, we reconised the girl. 'Pinky?'[1:5]_She was a very annoying girl we knew from new York City_

The blond beast grinned. 'There come my toys…'

I moaned with dismay.

Pinky explained, 'better don't call me Pinky, I'm enrolled here as Trisha Kirby.'

True shrugged.

_Whatever… Trisha or Pinky, hell was hell._ I tried to ignore the blond demon when I did my luggage.

We met the boys in the cafeteria.

It was not a bad place, but Stuart told us that the best place here was _Sushi Rox_, a Japanese restaurant run by one Kazu.

It was not open at that time of the day.

Leroy and Jack told us that some eighth grade girls, guided by the elder sister of Dustin, were up to challenge the boys in a match of basketball.

I was not yet very keen on sports.

True promised to join the girls'e teams.

Ryan claimed that girls were too weak for basketball.

We laughed. 'Says who?'

Ryan boomed, 'I'll show you where the cannons roar!' He was up to trying out for the boys' team.

Leroy told me that some other boys have threatened Dustin. 'If he cheers for the girls, he'll get his eyebrows shaved off!'

True protested, 'that's mean! He is of course entitled to cheer for his sister.'

'Leroy would cheer for me, too,' guessed I.

Leroy chuckled.

The initial whistle blew.

I was watching from the sidelines, along with Jack, Leroy, and Dustin.

The latter showed now less fear. He was so sweet.

Ryan fell flat on his face after ten seconds, and he was replaced with some Chase Matthews.

The girls showed a miserable performance.

I sighed with despair.

True tried her best, but she was desperately at a loss against some arrogant and beastly jerk named Logan Reese.

Logan even fouled Zoey Brooks — Dustin's sister and captain of the girls' team — in a brute and in every way deprecable manner.

The other girls were not nearly as good as Zoey, but some Dana Cruz appeared from nowhere.

Only three girls were left:

Zoey Brooks, Dana Cruz, and True.

Yeah, Zoey kept on playing, her severe scratches and bruises not withstanding.

What a power girl!

Now even Ryan cheered for the girls, along with me, Leroy, Jack, and Dustin.

Technically, also Nicole Bristow and Quinn Pensky were left, but they were, mildly spoken, suckish.

The final whistle blew, and, down to True's last effort, the girls secured a win over the boys by one point.

Logan Reese, the boys' captain, behaved like a crazed fury.

Coach Greery accepted Zoey and Dana into the school's first team, while True was on the list of subs, just in case.

I remarked that only my cheers had saved the girls' team.

True was not so sure.

In any way, Pinky Turzo, sorry, Trisha Kirby, claimed that she would have won the match on her own, without Zoey Brooks. She swore to ruin that "Miss Perfect" by all possible means.

True and I, we shook pur heads. _That was going to be one pain of a year…_

Asked for his action with which Ryan had made himself fall flat on his own face, Ryan remarked that he was trying to perform a salto backwards. 'This will impress the girls!'

True and I, we laughed heartily.

Ryan grunted, 'one day, you unbelievers will see. One day!' He dreamt of being Super-Ryan.

Michael Barret, a member of the boys' team, excused himself for the impossible behaviour of his "friend" and roomie Logan Reese. 'I really don't know why we are still friends. he such an embarrassing pain in the tail!'

True moaned. 'Apology accepted, not all boys in the team are jerks. But Logan will be so sorry!'

I grinned.

**Chapter 2 True Inventions**

At my old school in New York City, there was a science teacher named Mr. Jamisson. [2:1]. He was a mediocre teacher.

But his lessons were often funny, their danger notwithstanding.

Mr. Jamisson tried to improve and invent many things.

Unfortunately, inventions tended to backfire. They did not do that all the time, but if they did, you would have wished to live a few miles further down the road.

Oh, I could tell you stories…

Whatever, Mr. Jamisson was now far away.

But, nevertheless, I was strangely reminded of him when I met Quinn Pensky at her breakfast table.

Quinn was sitting alone.

I sat next to her. 'Why are you playing with the food?'

Quinn pouted. 'I'm not playing. I'm experimenting…' Quinn was apparently sort of a researcher.

I wondered about the theory.

Quinn mixed various juices and vinegars.

The resulting liquids often changed colours. They also started to hiss and to bubble at whim.

Now I did not wonder anymore why Quinn was always hanging out alone.

Then she took a T-bone steak, and she dipped it into the liquids.

Seconds later, the meat had disappeared, leaving the bone alone.

Quinn grinned with excessive glee.

My delicate stomach revolted, just as our fathers did once upon a time against injust English taxation laws.

After classes, I told True about my encounter with Quinn.

We were on our way home.

True giggled. 'She sounds a lot like Mr. Jamisson, don't you think so?'

Ryan walked past us. 'May you lend me a buck?'

True grunted. 'What is it for?'

Ryan needed desperately a sandwich.

True counted her bucks. 'This is my last dime for you… you already owe me 300 bucks from summer camp.'

Ryan looked clueless. 'No way!'

'Yes way,' replied True.

My pockets were empty. 'Why is lipgloss so expensive over here?'

Apparently, the school was not yet fully adapted to girls' needs.

True told us to earn our own money.

I sighed with despair.

The next day, I met Zoey on the campus.

She sighed. 'Quinn is a terrible roomie. She stabbed me with all kind of wires and monitored my cerebral activities while I was asleep.'

I puked onto the ground. 'That's icky!'

Zoey sighed. 'I moved in with Quinn because I could not bear my former roomies, i.e. Nicole and Dana, bicker like hell. But I've just made it from the frying pan into the boiling water.'

I scratched my head.

Zoey refrained from telling me more terrible stories. She called for a janitor.

We snuck away.

I wondered, 'is there no science club were she can do all that?'

Zoey wished one to exist. 'Alas, there is a scienceclub, but it's adviser is incompetent, and the club president, some Firewire, hates girls…'

I shuddered with disgust. 'So, with a more competent science teacher, Quinn would not have to use her room for dangerous and creepy experiments?'

Zoey nodded solemnly. 'But where should we take one from?'

I beamed. 'Mr. Jamisson…' I told her about that teacher of science.

Zoey agreed. 'That would be cool. But we need to ask Dean Rivers and the board.'

I moaned, 'why do adults make everything so complicated?'

Zoey nodded. 'They really do that.' But she promised to go to the administration and request hiring a new teacher for science.

I neede to ask Zoey something completely different. 'May you lend me some buck?'

Zoey shook her head. 'Dustin wanted to borrow some too, and I couldn't. He wasted all his money on gummi worms.'

I sighed deeply. 'True told me to earn some money…'

Zoey smiled. 'Dustin tries to tutor pupils. But a little hint: Having watched a Mexican movie does not make you a perfect teacher for Spanish.'

I pouted. 'It doesn't?'

Zoey shook her head.

I sighed. 'That's not fair!'

Zoey shrugged helplessly.

I met Dustin and Leroy in their lounge.

They were discussing about possibilities of making money.

Leroy wanted to buy bubble gum cheap and sell it for a triple price.

I shook my head. 'Pupils would kill you upon finding out.'

Leroy trembled. He ran away screaming.

Dustin was left alone with me. 'We could borrow a guitar and sing in a place where many pupils want to pass by, such as the cafeteria.'

I scratched my head. 'That sounds OK! But we will have to pay for the guitar…'

Dustin sighed.

I scratched my nose. 'OK, teaching Spanish might not work out, but there's sure something we're good enough…'

Dustin shrugged. 'I've applied for the mathlympic team…'

I beamed. 'Yeah! I love mathlympics!'

We high-fived. We were thitherfrom going to try to earn a few bucks teaching algebra.

Dustin showed me where to sign up for the mathlympic team.

I was totally excited. At my elementary school, I had been hated by almost everyone for liking algebra.

Thus it was cool to see that not everyone hated it.

Unfortunately, Leroy was my first pupil to tutor, and I could not request any money from my own little brother.

But my luck changed soon.

Ryan had decided to try out as a cheerleader. 'They get many tips from the football players…'

Unfortunately, the head of the cheerleading squad was Pinky. And she was determined to torment Ryan until the latter days.

Poor Ryan!

In addition, True remerked that only female cheerleaders were frequently rewarded with tips.

Ryan pouted. He looked much better than the girls in the squad, or so he thought. He showed us some incomplete cartwheel.

We giggled nosily.

Pinky, oops, Trisha, kicked Ryan's butt hard. 'You need to practise harder!'

Ryan tried to look for a poor excuse, but he could not find any.

Trisha grabbed himn and forced him into some acrobatic exercises.

Ryan's bones squeaked like a rusty door.

But Trisha showed no mercy.

But there were at least some good news:

Dean Rivers had successfully tried to hire Mr. Jamisson.

The crazy teacher for physics was going to reinforce our staff after the next term break.

In other words, Quinn was going to perform her experiments and make her inventions in the official laboratory rooms of the _Pacific Coast Academy_ instead of torturing her fellow pupils.

Nicole and Dana were also going to get along a bit better.

Quinn's silent leaf blower served Nicole as an electric fan with the wonderful property of not waking up sleeping Dana.

**Chapter 3 True Or Daring**

Ryan Laserbeam is usually a nice guy, but he gets sometimes annoyingly paranoidal.

One of his major fears was that of espionage.

True has suggested to go to our lounge and hang out with other the girls.

Ryanwanted to follow us.

'You're a boy,' said True, 'but we want to be among girls.'

'Hey,' protested Ryan, 'I like girls!'

I chuckled.

Ryan continued, 'I need to protect you from Russian spies.'

I giggled.

True panted and moaned, 'aw Ryan! This is a school, not the _White House_! The Russians don't spy on school kids, they spy on politicians and military camps…'

I scratched my long hair. 'Isn't the cold war over?'

True shrugged.

Ryan sighed. 'OK, then I will go to the pitch and practise for the cheerleading trials.'

We waved at Ryan.

We saw Zoey, Dana, Nicole, and Quinn playing _Confess Or Stress_.

They rolled dice.

Depending on the parity, they had to confess some embarrassing fact about themselves, or perform some gross task.

I talked about probabilities in dice games.

The other girls told me to shut up.

'Hey,' protested I, 'I haven't even talked about the law of large numbers and the central limit theorem.'

Dana stood up and tried to punch me.

True stopped Dana.

I sighed.

Logan Reese walked in.

'I thought this a boy-free zone,' complained I, 'otherwise we could have let Ryan join us.'

Zoey explained, 'Logan is the delivery boy of Kazu's.'

I gasped. 'Oops!'

The girls had apparently ordered some sushi.

Alas, Logan did not carry the dead fish.

Chase did.

Instead of that, Logan carried some large plush bear. He declared it a gift for us girls, making up for his recent rudeness.

We accepted that and placed the bear into some corner.

Logan and Chased took the money and left again in order to deliver other dead fish.

But why did Logan bother with such a job at all? His dad was Malcolm Reese, a member of the cream of Hollywood. The whole thing smelled as fishy as rotting sushi rolls.

True rolled the dice. 'Stress…' She sighed.

Nicole, Zoey, and Dana discussed.

Zoey announced, 'OK, True, you have to run around in a chicken costume.'

'No,' replied True, 'I won't!'

Nicole reminded us of the rules.

True sighed.

Dana gave True the costume.

It was mt turn to cast dice. 'Confess!' I scratched my chin. _There were so many embarrassing things…_

Dana urged me ti fess up. 'You've stolen my candy?' She threatened me with her cannon fists.

I shook my head. 'OK, you know that I often go to cinema with my little brother?'

The other girls nodded.

I continued, 'well, I actually like those movies, and Leroy is just my excuse to appear less weird when watching movies for kids of eight years.'

'No,' replied Nicole. 'I would die when doing so!'

Dana laughed like a mean hyena. 'Then do it!'

'Ouch!' Nicole pouted.

The next day, some boys walked the campus with a mischievous laughter on their face. They appeared to know about my preference for movies for younger kids. They also knew some embarrassing things about the other girls.

Of course talking abut them with boys was against the _girls' code_.

We girls were consternated. Even worse, we started accusing each other of betrayal.

As a result, True refused to talk to me anymore.

That was not fair!

I went to Ryan and told him about the miserable situation.

He laughed. 'I've told you, Russian spies are everywhere!'

I gasped. 'The spying sushi roll… wait, sushi is Japanese, not Russian. Oops!'

Ryan grinned.

I also met Dustin.

He told me, 'As Firewire is currently sick, I've been promoted to the middle school's algebra team.'

Firewire, properly Wayne Gilbert, was some arrogant science geek and dork.

That was great for a kid of 4th grade. 'Congrats!'

Dustin explained, 'in order to prepare for the contest, I'm allowed to visit the classes of Mr. Kirby.'

I smiled. 'Aw, I think you are smarter than him.'

Dustin smiled and chuckled.

Ryan objected, 'Don't do that! Mr. Kirby is a Trisha's uncle[3:1], and a Russian spy!'

I would have laughed about Ryan.

But he might have been right.

There must have been some spy.

I needed to get at the bottom of it.

Otherwise True might have hated me forever.

I asked Ryan, 'you have seen many movies about spies, haven't you?'

Ryan nodded with glee. 'My favourite is Jane Blonde — Agent 700[3:2], especially part five, where…'

I didn't want to know the details. 'So, you know most of the spies' tricks, don't you?'

Ryan nodded proudly.

We walked into the lounge when most girls were still in the cafeteria.

Ryan circumspected the situation. 'Wauit… where's that plush beast from?'

I told him about Logan's gift.

'I always knew it,' thundered Ryan in a triumphant manner, 'Logan Reese is a Russian spy! The same trick had been applied by …' He talked about one of his favourite movies. Circumspecting the bear, Logan concluded, 'there's a fire wire connection transmitting data from the bear to some laptop on the campus…'

I did not understand about fire wires.

The lounge was about filling.

Chase walked in. 'Sushi anyone? Please order at the same time., I have to do Logan's job, because he's sick.'

So… Firewire was sick, and so was Logan.

Now I understood why Wayne was called 'Firewire'.

Logan must have hired him to turn the plush pet into a spying beast. And the job was just in order to have a good reason for entering the girls' lounge.

I gathered the other girls.

Ryan told them the truth about that bear.

The girls gasped.

Ryan had an idea. 'Now tell many tasteless Logan jokes! He will faint when he has to listen to them.'

The girls deemed this a cool idea.

The following days, Logan went black and blue in his face, until he went insane and gave up on that bear.

Alas, Dustin was now even more convinced that Mr. Kirby was a Russian spy.

Zoey sighed. As a protective sister, she could not talk Dustin into going there. Even if Kirby was no spym, there might have been many bullies envying Dustin.

But I offered to practise for the contest with Dustin, as I was also a member of the team.

Zoey nodded. 'Thanks, Lulu. I'm going to go to that party with your little brother, in turn.'

I chuckled insanely. 'Cool!'

**Chapter 4 True Commercial**

True and I, we were sitting in the lounge.

Zoey, Nicole, and Dana walked in. They wqere discussing about commercials.

True asked Zoey, 'which commercials are you talking about?'

Zoey sighed. 'A class project… we have to make a commercial for a new scooter named "Jet-X". Those with the best commercial are awarded with a scooter each.'

Nicole squealed, 'we need scooters. Down to Dana, we're always waking up late, and then we fail to make it to our classes in time.'

Dana kicked Nicole hard.

Nicole whimpered in agony.

We were too young to ride a scooter.

For that avail, True shrugged.

Zoey said, 'Dana is the director, while Nicole is the playwright. I have to create the outfit, especially the clothes.'

True listened with increased interest. She was very creative when it came down to visual arts.

Her biggest dream was the decoration of one of the greatest galleries in New York City.

Zoey opened a folder with her designs.

Nicole and Dana were astonished.

Unfortunately, the dresses were designed for girls with somewhat bigger breasts.

Dana sighed. 'That's impossible… we are not that much developed.'

Nicole suggested, 'maybe Coco could …'

True puked.

Coco Wexler was the chubby dorm adviser of the girls' team. She would certainly have filled Zoey's optimistically designed dresses, but she ould have rather scared the teenagers away.

Ryan bounded in. 'Then we just need to find better girls…'

True intervened. 'OK, maybe I can help designing the outfit? I want to make it into that sort of business.'

Zoey smiled. 'Cool.'

I suggested, 'we could hire some supermodel!'

Dana complained, 'they cost too much.'

True glared at me. 'This is not Hollywood, this is a commercial for average teenagers. Thus you need young average teenagers to present the scooter.'

Zoey sighed. 'It still isn't fair. The boys are going to win, because Logan gets the whole equipment and stuff from his father's production team.'

I sighed. 'That's not fair!'

We were back to our dorms.

Pinky grinned when she heard about our problems. 'I guess your friend Zoey will lose badly…'

'No way,' thundered Ryan. He launched his web goggles. 'Hey, I found a list of cheap models in the area that are still at the beginning of their career.'

True and I, we looked closely.

There were actually a few upcoming models of our age living in the greater LA area.

The next day, Zoey was consternated when we entered the lounge. 'Nicole and Dana can't work together anymore.'

I wondered, 'what has happened?'

Zoey sighed deeply. 'Dana calls Nicole's script lame. And Nicole only talks about the juices that her dad produces. She thinks that we should use them for our commercials, just as Logan does with his dad's equipment and staff.'

Nicole squealed, 'it's good juice!'

I was all of a sudden very thirsty. 'Do you have huckleberry juice?'

Nicole nodded solemnly.

I squealed, 'ouch!'

In any case, the group was now split.

True decided us to go different ways, too.

I joined Nicole because of the huckleberry juice.

True helped Zoey in order to improve the outfit.

Ryan was left with Dana.

Logan Reese introduced the star of his commercial: Jeff Garrett, a famous Hollywood star.

The chances of the girls teams' were thusly reduced to zilch.

I definitely wanted to see Jeff, as did True.

But we were a bit too far away from the place where Logan produced his commercial.

His roomies Michael and Chase were sidelined and bored to death.

Logan's commercial was like a Hollywood movie.

We were lost and doomed.

Dana's goal was to demonstrate that Jet-X was fast.

Ryan had practised a lot with Dana's skateboard, making her somewhat angry. Now he had to make up for it. 'I've got a great idea. We make a little competitive race. I on my skateboard, you on the scooter. In the end, you will pass by me, yelling something to the avail of _Jet-X breaks the records_!'

Dana glared at Ryan. 'I hope this works out, or you will be so sorry for taking my skateboard!'

Ryan trembled. But he felt infallible.

Quinn was going to record the race with her webcam.

Zoey and True were done reworking the outfit.

Zoey's slogan was _Jet-__X__ for freedom!_

True was of the same opinion.

And they were reinforced by an aspiring model.

Her name was Caterina Vega.

But she used an artist's name, Rebecca.[4:1]

She grinned when she donned Zoey's outfit. She almost filled the optimistic outlines of Zoey's dress, notwithstanding her age of twelve years only.

True would have preferred Viviana Martinez, aka Vivienne[4:2], who happened to be a cousin of Rebecca's half-sister Victoria.

But Zoey had to decide in favour of Rebecca because of problems with Viviana's schedule and the urgency of the commercial.

Alas, Rebecca did not seem to like Zoey's face.

I didn't understand why this was the case.

But it was definitely confusing.

In any case, Rebecca did very well in her rôle inspite of scaring the living hell out of Zoey.

They tied some ballons to the scooter.

Rebecca said, 'Jet-X … you feel like flying away!'

Quinn recorded the scene.

Then there was Nicole's commercial.

We wanted to show something like, 'Jet-X — It makes you cooler!'

Dustin had scripted Nicole's words.

Nicole sat down on the scooter, saying above slogan.

At the same time, I handed her a bottle of ice-cooled huckleberry smoothie from Nicole's dad.

Again, Quinn's webcam did the trick.

The race was on between Ryan and Dana.

Ryan was leading the race. Then he was passed by Dana.

The girl squealed, 'Jet-X — it breaks all speed records!'

Alas, in the last moment, Pinky Turzo passed both of them on her inline skates, grinning triumphantly. 'I've told you, I'm doing you in!'

Dana was consternated. 'A scooter beaten by an inline skater, that's embarassing!'

Quinn sighed. 'I may try to cut Turzo out, but…'

Dana ordered Quinn to do that!

The end of the song:

Pinky's triumphant face was impossible to eliminate from the commercial.

Dana's contribution was thus totally spoiled.

Logan's commercial was deemed inappropriate for a product for young teenagers. It was more of a short version of Malcolm Reese's movies for younger adults.

Zoey's commercial suffered from Rebecca's mischieveous grin.

Rebecca appeared ready to run over Zoey.

This suggested road violence. Thus it was nowhere near suited for teenagers.

There was finally one contribution left: Nicole Bristow's cool commercial.

Nicole won the Jet-X.

That was so cool, wasn't it?

**Chapter 5 True Theatre**

Of course our vicinity to Hollywood was not without significant traces, inspite of us not being as dedicated as _Palmwood_ or _Hollywood School Of Art_.

Our school had got a great drama club.

Its adviser, Mr. Fletcher, had been working as a director and playwright at Hollywood. He still was occasionally active for Malcolm Reese. Today, he was announcing our middle school play. 'I'm glad to announce the choice of a script written by one of our pupils: Chase Matthews!'

We applauded.

The play was about an Alien girl named Zorka saved by a life guard.

At the end, the alien girl was supposed to kiss the life guard.

_Swoon!_ I so wanted to audition.

True was done to style a dress for my audition.

I thought, 'a proper dress will get me the rôle of Zorka in that play.'

"Pinky" Trisha just blew up some bubble gums. 'Which play? I will play with your face.'

Some smithereens of a popped gum hit my cheeks.

'Egad!' I was thoroughly disgusted.

Trisha giggled gleefully.

True grunted for no avail.

Chase may have weanted to be the life guard.

Alas, for some obscure reason, Logan Reese tried out, too, and he was selected by Mr. Fletcher.

Zoey Brooks had been first choice for the rôle of Zorka.

Chase had probably written the script with Zoey as Zorka in mind, given those many letters in common…

The girls trying out before Zoey were disgusting:

One of them shouted too much.

The other one sang instead of talking.

And then there was Mark Del Figgalo, a fat guy wearing a girls' wig.

Now it was my turn to try out.

Reese was a jerk, but probably a good kisser.

Alas, I was terribly excited and flunked the whole thing.

True comforted me.

Chase was worried. _Zoey deserved better than having to kiss the jerk._

Next, Ryan was about trying out. 'I've justv learned surfing. I'm the born lifeguard!' He performed a backward salto on a surfboard.

Mr. Fletcher applauded. 'OK, that's our lifeguard!'

I applauded for Ryan.

Logan pouted,

His mood was now stinky.

True did not quite understand the connection between the backward saltio and the rôle of a lifeguard, though.

I couldn't give her an answer, either.

I returned from the mathlympic practice.

Dustin had been missing.

I asked Leroy about it.

My brother replied sadly. 'he must have caught a flu. Now he's desperately looking for Zoey to help him.'

I sighed. _Poor Dustin!_

Of course, Dustin had been unable to find Zoey in her dormmitory block.

His sister was practising in the drama club.

I found Dustin in Quinn's room. _Oh no! She's torturing him!_

Quinn had tied Dustin to a bed post and was now applying some strange therapies.

I had to inform Zoey!

Without hesitation, I stormed the drama club's practice room.

Mr. Fletcher was annoyed. 'We're practising!'

I pouted. 'Sorry, it's an emergency. Zoey, Quinn is doing some terrible thiongs to your sick brother.'

Zoey gasped. 'What? Dustin is sick? Why did nobody tell me earlier? OK, Quinn may dig her own tomb. She has gone way over the top. I'm out of here!' She shook her booties and darted away like a freshly greased flash of lightening.

Consternated Mr. Fletcher gasped. 'Miss Brooks? But…' He stomped his feet.

But it was pointless.

Mr. Fletcher needed to look for a new Zorka.

"Pinky" Trisha walked up to the stage. She wore inline skates. 'Hey! We Zorkesians are born with rolls on our feet. Want to see?'

Mr. Fletcher fainted. 'That's perfect! Yeah, Chase, why did you not think of that?'

Trisha performed some skating tricks, talking Zorka's text at the same time.

Mr. Fletcher applauded enthusiastically. 'That's supertastic! I've found the new Zorka!'

Chase Matthews nodded in an apathetic manner.

Ryan was not exactly keen on Mr. Fletcher's choice.

Trisha grinned triumphantly on her way out. 'Bye-bye, Ryan! I will do you in.' She smiled sadistically.

Ryan fainted critically.

Zoey had been rebuking Quinn severely for torturing Dustin. 'Never ever dare again to hurt him!'

Quinn stammered, 'but it was for his own good. I've tried to help him!'

Zoey grunted, 'all lies! He's still coughing like a rusty steam engine!'

Dustin produced some worrying sounds with his throat and his nose.

Quinn pouted.

Zoey huggled her brother and took him away. 'Come on. Grandma's herbal infuses and some warm towels will help you.'

Dustin smiled painfully. He was often enough annoyed by Zoey's protectivity. But he appreciated her loving care in those cases.

I accompanied Zoey i order to help her making the tea, In addition, I wanted to learn what to do in case of Leroy getting sick… _Oh no! As Dustin's roomie, Leroy was likely to catch the flu in no time!_

I had learned quickly from Zoey.

My fears had come true.

Now I was sitting next to Leroy's bed, nursing him lovingly.

We needed to avoid him getting sent to the nurse's station.

The official nurse was a perverted fury.

Unfortunately, dealing with our sick little brothers made us ill, too.

For that avail, I had to miss out on Ryan's performance.

Ryan and Lulu came back.

Ryan was still all pale.

I wondered, 'how was it?'

True giggled. 'Ryan has been trying to invent gazillions of stupid white lies in order to escape from Pinky's kiss.'

Ryan urged True to keep her mouth shut, 'No details!'

I grinned. 'For what avail?'

Ryan sighed. 'Pinky just flashed her lips closed to mine. And she whispered something like…' He choked,

True chuckled. 'Pinky is going to get him, some day… maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but some day, when he expects it least…'

Excessively terrified Ryan twitched and shivered.

I laughed my cheeks off. 'Oh, I know something against Ryan's problems.'

True shrugged. 'Cool! What is it?'

I grinned. 'Zoey's herbal tea. It calms you down and makes you relax.'

True grinned. _The bitter one, right?_

I nodded solemnly.

True took a cup and filled it.

Ryan gasped. 'No! Not the bitter one!'

I chuckled.

True grabbed Ryan and poured the contents of the cup down his jaw.

Ryan screamed like a steam whistle.

But it was for his own good.

True reasoned, 'theatre must be truly great. Next year, I will try out for Shakespeare's _Romeo And Juliet_.'

I sighed. 'OK!'

Ryan wonderd. 'Shakespeare? Who's that? Is he hotter than me?'

**Chapter 6 True Party**

Our school's annual spring party was just around the corner.

Alas, Dustin and Jack told us that those things used to be totally lame.

I sighed. 'But I love parties…'

'I am the life of a party,' boasted Ryan.

True calmed us down. 'Zoey is trying to beef up this year's spring fling.'

I wondered how. 'Orlando Bloom will come?'

True shook her head.

'Hell no,' replied Ryan, 'Bloom would just go pale for envy at a party featuring me!' He beamed.

True glared at Ryan. Then she started to explain, 'well, a few weeks ago, great Devin Malone anted to gibe a concert in San Diego. But he got his hand damage. Previously unknown rock guitarist Drake Parker subbed for him. Now Devin declared Drake to be the next top rock star.'[6:1]

I smiled. 'So, Devin Malone will come?'

True shook her head. 'No, but Drake Parker… or so says Zoey.'

I wondered, 'is Drake hot?'

Ryan grinned, 'no one is as hot as me.'

True cackled. 'probably… he's a rock guitarist. And boys in rock bands are always hot, aren't they?'

I beamed with glee. 'Of course!'

Alas, the very next day brought a sudden end to my good mood.

Dana explained, 'Drake's manager requires 5,000 bucks!'

Nicole sobbed bitterly. 'But I love Drake!'

'Hey, that's a number with four digits,' remarked I.

True admitted, 'we know that you are good with numbers, but it doesn't take us that much to understand that we can't afford Drake.'

Ryan grinned proudly. 'Drake is just afraid of my competition!'

I glared at Ryan with anger.

Zoey was depressed, but she expressed some hope. 'We may raise funds for the concert.'

I wondered how.

Zoey shrugged. 'Usual stuff… car wash, melon bashing… with True's assistance, I could even design some genuine Drake-Parker outfit. Many girls will pay bucks for that…'

I shrugged. 'Cool!'

Ryan complained, 'a Ryan-Laserbeam outfit would give you more bucks!'

'Dream on,' replied I.

The day for raising funds was there.

We had piled a bunch of melons.

Ryan was going to bash them with his head while riding a skateboard across the campus. He was running a bet with Pinky.

Alas, I had bad news for Zoey. I called her over.

Zoey sighed. 'The action is so much fun, what's wrong?'

I showed Zoey my calculations. 'Considering the price of the lemons, the raw linen shirts, soap, polish, and warm water for the car wash…'

Zoey was consternated upon taking a look at the sums.

I concluded, 'this is nowhere going to approach the mark of 5,000 bucks. Rather, you have to be lucky to be able to cover the expenses.'

Leroy came in. 'Zoey! Sis! Hurry up! Quinn is torturing Dustin!'

Zoey was consternated. 'She will pay dearly for that!'

Quinn abused Dustin for an experiment concerning sleep withdrawal.

Zoey's wrath was going to be a most horrible one.

I did not want to be in Quinn's place.

Zoey returned, with Dustiun being all pale and exhausted.

Leroy and I, we dragged Dustin to his bed.

Zoey did not want us to watch her unspeakable actions against Quinn.

We walked past Ryan.

Trying to be faster than Pinky, Ryan headbutted some other melon.

Alas, it was not a melon, it was the car of Dean Carl Rivers!

The headmaster had stationed his machine in order to get it washed.

Now Ryan could expecxt to get his head washed, instead.

I added 3,000 further bucks to the summa summarum of expenses…

Rivers bellowed, 'who was that? The action is cancelled!' He swore some terrible consequences.

True was sad. She had put so many efforts into the outfit wearing Drake's logo.

We were left deep in the debts.

Stuart was trying hard to talk his brother Ryan out of trouble.

The headmaster finally lowered it down to two weeks of detention.

Ryan hated Pinky for that terrible bet gone awry.

But this did not help us getting out of our debts.

True sobbed. 'At least we may show Drake our outfits. Then it wasn't quite for naught.'

Zoey agreed and high-fived with True.

I sighed deeply.

They were going to use their designs in order to hit on Drake?

That was totally unfair!

All girls here should have had the same chances of Drake!

Zoey called Drake again, talking about the outfits.

Drake squealed, 'hey, our current outfit sucks like crap. I should fire my manager for that and use my step-brother Josh in his place. Anyways, if I like yours, I'll play for free at your school…'

True and Zoey cheered enthusiastically.

This meant equal chances of Drake for allgirls at our school.

Yeah!

Drake and his band left their van. They were clad completely in True's and Zoey's products.

Nicole was the fastest of us girl. She threw her arms around him and pressed him against the band's van with her lips.

Zoey had got a hard time calming Nixcole down. 'He can't perform this way.'

Nicole gasped, 'oops!'

Even executive chairman Garth Berman attended the concert.

Drake started playing _Found A Way_ and _Highway To Nowhere_.[6:2]

We cheered along.

A girl in Dustin's age snuck from behind the van. 'I'm Megan Parker, the sister of that boob.' She meant Drake.

I wondered about the word _boob_.

But it didn't really matter.

Megan showed me a contract.

With this document, Zoey and True were now permanently in charge with the band's outfit.

Drake was now going to perform for us each year.

The recompensation for the first year allowed us even to pay back for our debts, including the costs for the headmaster's damaged car.

Zoey was now always going to look for my advice whenever it came down to big numbers.

Quinn was thitherfrom going to abuse her new boyfriend Mark del Figgalo for her experiments. But during Drake's concert, she was tied to a lamppost by Zoey, forced to listen to Drake's music for two hours straight. She hated Drake's music!

Megan explained, 'see, I have to listen to the jerk's practice three hours each day.'

I giggled.

At the same time, Ryan showed his disappointment over being less of a girl eater than Drake Parker. He sighed with despair.

Pinky grinned. Passing by Ryan, she declared, 'I'm going to do you in!' The she raced by Drake and kissed him briefly.

Ryan trembled.

Alas, Dustin fell asleep on my lap. He was still tired from Quinn's experiment.

That was a bit embarrassing for me, wasn't it?

I liked Dustin in some way, but he was just a pal of my younger brother, definitely not my boyfriend. I blushed anyways.

Where was that going to lead me?

**Chapter 7 True Enemy**

Nicole had recently spoiled a backpack in the campus shop, by mere accident. She hated the ugly thing.

I would have hated that backpack, too.

But Zoey had turned the same backpack into a piece of artwork.

True had not been able to resist. She chose some other accessory, a baseball cap, and adorned it in a really fashionable manner, with multi-coloureed ribbons and other sorts of stuff.

We were now gathered in the lounge in order to adore their works.

Ryan and I, we were totally enchanted. We applauded and cheered at the top of our lungs.

A girl watched the situyation with a curious face. She claimed to work for the _Daily Stingray_[7:1], our school's newspaper.

But her face was too familiar to me…

Yet I needed just another hint in order to complete the puzzle.

For Ryan, everything was obvious.

'She's a Russian spy,' declared my hitherto best male friend.

I giggled. 'Who isn't?'

Ryan grunted, 'don't tell me I haven't warned you!'

I scratched my chin. _But maybe there was some truth to it?_ Yet I've never watched espionage channel.

The girl's face must have been familiar to me for a different reason.

I kept on pondering.

Half a day later, I had found some sort of a solution. As a mathletic, I had been in a contest against the best team of San Diego county, which happened to be _Belleview_. In order to back up my suspicious moments, I asked Dustin.

He nodded solemnly. 'I remember, too. Let's go to their website.'

A few mouseclicks later…

'Dang, it's the same school as that of Drake Parker and his sister,' remarked I.

Dustin beamed proudly. 'Look,there they are… and her name is… Melinda Crenshaw!'

I ecided to ask Megan about Melinda.

Megan's answer was flabbergasting.

Melinda Crenshaw had not only been in the mathletic team, she had also been a solicitor at the honour council of _Belleview_.[7:2] She had almost got Drake framed for one of her own deeds, an action of revenge against a perverse and corrupt teacher named Mrs. Hayfer. Thereupon she had been suspened from _Belleview_.

This was down to Megan's rigorous and tricky intervention.

Megan must have loved her "boob" more than admitted.

The date of her suspension was just a week before.

Dustin concluded without hesitating, 'Mindy is a spy.'

I agreed. 'Someoe able to geta fellow pupil framed for her own desperate action is also able to spy on fellow pupils.'

We had to warn True and Zoey.

Ryan cackled with glee. 'I knew it! She's a Russian spy!'

True sighed. 'I'm sure she's going to plagiarise us. But is she really working for someone?'

I shrugged. 'We need to prove it?'

Ryan wondered, 'why not just ask her?'

True glared quizzically, 'spies will never admit to it upon simply asking them!'

I sighed. 'Megan may know some tricks. She's very tricky.'

Ryan cackled.

Indeed, Mindy started selling plagiarised accessories on the campus.

I walked up to her table. 'Melinda Crenshaw…'

Mindy gasped. 'My name is Stasie!'

Her name was as fake as her smile.

I mentioned the honour council.

Mindy gasped. 'Hey, you've never been there, you can't know!' But then she recognised me from the mathletic trials. 'Hey, you are… Lucille Johnson…'

I nodded solemnly. 'Almost… Lulu Johnson. But that's not that important. Megan Parker told me everything about you.'

Mindy's face froze to a block of ice. 'Megan…'

I smiled. 'Miss Crenshaw. What are you doing here?'

Mindy stammered, 'I study? I've got suspended from my old school, thus I go to a new school.' She tried to whistle innocently, but she failed horribly.

I shrugged. 'Megan Parker has taught me a few means to get you to talk. See you later…' I started walking away.

Mindy felt increasingly nervous. She was apparently afraid of Megan Parker's methods. 'Wait!'

I turned around. 'What?'

Mindy sighed bitterly. 'Recently, a fashion label from New York City had seen Drake parker's new diesign. They turned envious as they haven't got anyone as gifted as True and Zoey. They fear their competition more than nukes and pestillence. Thus they hired me in order to spy on them.'

Ryan appeared from brhiond a shrubbery. 'Recirded!'

Mindy startled. She had believed in a concersation of just the two of us.

Ryan grinned. 'Who paid you?'

Mindy refused to talk. 'They are going to kill me for treason.'

Ryan threatened. 'Not if we kill you earlier for not fessing up!'

I stopped Ryan. 'OK, we will forget about everything, but there's one condition.'

Mindy glared. 'Which condition?'

I explained, 'you have certainly heard about Quinn Pensky?'

Mindy nodded. Like Quinn, Mindy was interested in science fairs. 'She's here, right?'

I confirmed that. 'She's working on a revolutionary project, crossing apples and bananas.'

Mindy listened with excitement. 'I love genetic experiments. I've recently cloned my puppy.'

I grinned. 'Cool, then you will be able to help Quinn with her stuck eperiments. The banapple tree is now bearing fruits, but they are too caustic.'

Mindy smiled. 'OK… that will be easy. The name of the fashion label paying me in order to destroy Zoey and Lulu is… _Simon Christini_[7:3].'

The name didn't tell me much.

Alas, True had heard of _Simon Christini_. 'They are really big, number two in New York City.'

I was shocked. 'Wow! You must be really great as a fashion artist.'

True sighed.

I suggested, 'you could work for the number one. Maybe they will reward you and Zoey generously.'

True shook her head. 'Nobody is employing middle school kids. And number one is certainly unreachable. Their name is _MadStyle_, by Maximilian Madigan. That would be a dream, buyt impossible.'

I shrugged. 'Never say never!'

We were sitting relaxed in our lounge, drinking supremely delicious banapple smoothie.

Mindy and Quinn were a very good team, scaring the geek boys at our school.

At the same time, Zoey and True were marketing their designs at the campus shops in order to finance the new dvd box for the lounge.

They had not yet received an offer from Maximilian Madigan.

But their time to shine was still to come.

And maybe I could do something to accelerate that.

There were means and tricks in order to achieve that.

**Chapter 8 True Dance Partner**

I was sitting in my history classes with Ryan and Lulu.

Mr. Toplin[8:1] talked about the war of thirty years. 'Ryan Laserbeam, who were the victims of the defenestration of prague?'

Ryan twitched. 'The windows of that city?'

Toplin grunted, 'no!'

Pinky blew up some bubble gum into Toplin's face.

'Detention,' decided Toplin.

Suddenly, two high school kids entered. They had something to announce. 'OK, it's time for our annual middle school dance.'

Many kids cheered.

I wondered, 'we are the first year of girls at this schools. What were former middle school dances like?'

Nobody wanted to answer.

The organiser of the dance explained, 'this yearm, a computer will decide on your partner, upon evaluating some questionary.' He distributed forms to fill in.

True tried to fill in the questionary as seriously and honestly as can be.

Ryan, on the other hand, exaggerated beyond any measure. 'Hey! I'm Super-Ryan!'

I giggled. 'Favourite subject: Mathematics. Favourite sport: … hey, True, what sort of sports do boys admire girls most for?'

True shrugged. 'Probably cheerleading, why?'

I smiled, inserting 'Cheerleading' into my questionary.

True was not content with my lack of honesty.

I showed remorses. So I just inserted 'any'.

Dustin , Jack, and Leroy were disappointed because the school was only for the middle school kids. 'We elemantary school kids want to have fun, too!'

But maybe that was not necessarily a bad thing.

Dustin was worried about Zoey having to dance with some jerk.

The questionaries had finally been evaluated.

We stood in a long queue in order to get informed about our dance partners.

Ryan was in fromt of us girls, ready to read about his supergirl. He swooned in anticipation. Then he was up to reading, 'Ryan Laserbeam … Pinky Turzo.' He choked hard. 'Pinky?'

I was not pleased, either.

True coughed.

Pinky Turzo skated past us. 'Hi Ryan, I'm going to do you in at the dance.' She grinned sadistically.

Ryan trembled like an aspen tree in a tornado.

Now it was True's turn to take a look. 'Olivary Biallo? Who, pray tell, is Olivary Biallo?'

A very exotic looking guy past by. He spoke with an exotic accent. 'You are True?'

My best friend nodded.

'I'm Olly,' answered the guy, 'Olivary Biallo, you know, your partner for the dance of the year!'

True coughed and moaned, 'er… maybe we haven't read it correctly… let's countercheck!'

Alas, the result stayed the same.

True was consternated.

I closed my eyes when I stood in front of the bulletin blackboard. 'Lulu Johnson and… Wayne Gilbert? Firewire? Really?' I threw up.

This was going to be the worst nightmare since my transfer to the _Pacific Coast Academy_.

True had made our outfits for the dance.

We moved slowly into the party hall.

Firewire was already waiting for me. He cackled with glee.

I had only heard horror stories about him. _Was he really eating little girls? Ryan thought so._

Actually, Firewire appeared to be afraid of me as much as I was afraid of him.

Pinky, on the other hand, tortured Ryan with her excessively arrogant smile. 'You won't forget this evening!'

Ryan shivered in agony.

In turn, True tried to teach Olivary Biallo a few American manners.

Ryan told her, 'don't do that, Olivary Biallo is a typical Russian spy!'

Actually, Olivary had claimed to be an exchange student.

But there was no such country he may have been from.

Maybe Ryan was right?

I had to investigate.

Zoey Brooks had been appointed with some Glen Davis.

Chase was in a stinky mood.

And now the two boys were at each other's throat.

Zoey had got enough of it all, and she left the ball without warning after less than an hour.

Now we needed to get Biallo to fess up.

Firewire shivered.

I told him, 'hey, I don't bite! Why are you so afraid of girls?'

Firewire just cackled as usual.

That was sad.

One of his pals had told me, 'Firewire is adamantly opposed to girls in the science club.'

Well, this year, the science club was more or less unsupervised.

I thought of Firewire, Quinn, and Mindy as a poteantially quite strong team.

But the following year, Mr. Jamison was going to take over. Maybe he was able to reunite the bickering parties.

Ryan and Pinky were dancing. Both of them boasted mercilessly with their excessively strange skating skills.

Pinky made Ryan totally nervous with phrases like _your face is a toy_.

True couldn't stand her, either. But she was now occupied with Olivary. 'So, where are you really from? You must be a Russian spy!'

Olivary coughed. 'No, I'm nit from Russia, I'm from…' He panted heavily. 'I'm from La Mesa, San Diego county.'

True gasped.

I would have done the same.

But the loud music prevented me from doing so.

I needed to take a break and go outside in order to look for Zoey.

The noise of the party penetrated also the campus. But it did not prevent you from hearing your own voice.

I stumbled upon Dustin and Leroy. 'Hi, what are you doing here?'

Dustin shrugged. 'Trying to sneak in?'

I gasped. 'Whatever, you must have seen Zoey, haven't you?'

Dustin nodded. 'She was upset because of all the jerks at the party. But now she met Stu Laserbeam. He cheered her up.'

I shrugged. 'Good for your sister!' I sighed with rellief and returned to the party and to Firewire.

I got along with Firewire.

He wasn't as terrible as everyone thought, just a bit strange. Well, he was very strange.

Dana and Logan kicked and punched each other during the dance. They looked like one happy sadomasochist couple.

Quin had it easy.

Her Mark did not know how to use a computer. Thus he had begged Quinn into filling in the questionary on his behalf.

Now Quinn had to dance around Mark by herself all the time.

Mark was too inert to move along with the rhythm.

Nicole Bristow was busily dancing and arguing with some Nicholas Webber, a cute bimbo boy.

The music was now less enervating. It was sort of a standing blues.

True came to me and told me about Olivary. 'His real name is Jeromne Crony[8:2], and he is from San Diego county. He's here because he wants to switch schools. At his current school, he is member of a bully gang.'

I was consternated.

True calmed me down. 'Only the boss of the gang, Billy Loomer, is dangerous. Crony is just afraid of admitting to his unmanly hobby. That's why he hides behind Loomer.'

I wondered, 'which hobby?'

True whispered, 'he loves textile creation.'

I beamed. 'Wow, you do the same…'

True sighed. 'We need to help him and convince Dean Rivers of Crony's person. A school like this is his only chance.'

Ryan fell flat to the ground. He had been totally exhausted by Pinky's aggressive dancing style.

We needed to carry him away from the action.

Over in the lounge, we met Zoey and Stu.

Ryan's brother looked worried. 'Oh my goodness! What have they done to you?'

Ryan moaned for exhaustion.

Zoey explained, 'Stu is going to take me to his prom'

True and I, we were consternated. 'What?'

Stu nodded. 'I pity her because she has been so disappointed by the middle school boys.'

True looked at Stu. 'Hey! There's another reason. You really like Zoey!'

Zoey blushed.

Stu admitted shamefully. 'OK, we understand each other fairly well, because both of us have strong artistic inclinations. whereas our parents expect us to go for a business career, such as a CEO.' He sighed with despair.

Zoey nodded sadly.

We successfully plead for the rehabilitation of Jerome Crony.

Dean Rivers granted him a probation of four months.

We were now looking forward to another year at this school, and to many new pupils, some of them already known to us, some of them not.

Stu was soon going to graduate and leave Los Angeles. He had obtained a scholarship as an apprentice and assistant of Harry Joiner[8:3], America's greatest pop artist of the century turn.

But this separation in space and time was not going to stop him and Zoey from growing closer and closer.

* * *

**Part II  
Second Season**

* * *

**Chapter 9 True Power**

Our second year at _Pacific Coast Academy_ was only a few hours old.

We did not have to change dormitory rooms.

Pinky, though, had failed sixth grade, and she was now no longer with me and True.

This made us sigh with extreme relief.

But what if her substitute was even worse?

I shuddered.

I was lying with True on our respective beds, listening to music.

Suddenly our new roomie showed up. She was not unknown to us: Viviana Martinez. This aspiring supermodel grinned and cheered when she met us.

We hugged her almost to death.

But she needed to go. 'My elder sister Lola is waiting for me. She has just been assigned to _101 Brenner Hall_.'

I remembered that our high school juniors were also bound for that room.

We helped Viviana to find her sister.

Lola looked basically quite similar to Vivian, but she wore black stuff.

We were scared.

Lola appeared to talk to the dead.

I giggled.

Viviana calmed us down, 'Lola isn't a death punk. She's an actress who practises for some job in some horror movie.'

I sighed with relief.

True nodded solemnly. 'Hey, this is also the room of Nicole and Zoey!'

I wondered. 'What happened to Dana?'

Nicole bounded in. She shrieked.

Zoey stunbled after Nicole. 'Oops!' But she was able to answer the question. 'Dana left the school, she's said to be in Paris for some reason.'

I was a bit disappointed. _Dana and Logan had "Harmonised" so well at the school dance. What a pity!_

Nicole smiled. 'She was just a pest. But Lola…'

I told Nicole about Lola's real personality. 'So, she's just sort of a Hollywood star.'

Nicole smiled. 'Cool!'

Lola was disappointed. 'Did you have to spoil everything?'

We sighed deeply.

Zoey had wondered about Dustin. 'I haven't seen him since he went carrying stuff for Logan.'

I wondered, 'what stuff?'

Nicole replied, 'video game stations, stereo plants, HiFi stuff…'

True and I, we had been missing out on Ryan for quite some time, too.

Circumambulating the campus, we heard a hell of a noise from one of the boys' dormitory blocks. We needed to check.

The terrible noise came forth from _Rigby Hall_.

We had to check that.

There we were:

The lounge of _Rigby_, full of boys and some girls celebrating the begin of the year.

The celebrations were powered by Logan Reese's entertainment system.

Dustin and Ryan were right among them.

I took my cellular phone and sent an SMS unto Zoey Brooks.

She replied, ordering me to get Dustin out of there.

Boys in his age were not supposed to listen to too loud music.

Leroy and Jack didn't do such a thing.

What a responsibility.

Was Dustin actually going to listen unto me?

I grabbed his wrists.

He was upset. 'Hey, I have still fifty levels left to go! And the higfh score…' He wasn't addicted to playing the game, but to the numbers of the high score.

I sighed. 'Want to play _sudoku_ with me?'

Dustin glared aghast.

I explained, _a Japanese game with numbers… something like Latin squares, just a bit more complicated._

Dustin beamed. 'Yeah, I love Latin squares!' He followed me on site.

True was now left alone, trying to convince Ryan.

I crossed the campus along with Dustin. We met Mr. Jamison, our new teacher for science.

I introduced him to Dustin.

They shook hands.

Then I explained the situation in the boys' lounge.

Mr. Jamison gasped. 'Don't they know that all their hifi devices suck up too much power? This will lead to a power failure in exactly 700 minutes.'

I was astonished. 'How could he know that?' 'And there's nothing to do about this?'

The science teacher scratched his heqd. 'I could increase the power supplies. How about making it give us like … seven hundred times that much power?'

Dustin gasped. 'So much?'

I wondered, 'That's possible?'

Mr. Jamison sighed. 'With uranium cells… you know, radioactivity…'

I was shocked. 'Isn't that illegal?'

'Unfortunately, I think so,' admitted Jamison. 'I've recently met a guy named Cal[9:1] at some science fair. H makes wonderful things with what I suppose to be uranium cells. One stick may suplly the whole Manhattan isle with power.'

Dustin grinned. 'Cool!'

I sighed. 'We don't want to be arrested for that.'

Mr. Jamison nodded. 'OK, there are also legal sources of power: the wind, the tidal waves, the sun… this is California, not New Yoork City.'

I understood, 'we've got a lot more sun than back in New England.'

Mr. Jamison nodded. 'So, all we need is a project, providing their lounge with solar energy.'

Dustin wondered, 'but what will the boys in their do by night?'

Mr. Jamison nodded and replied, 'well, there are those cool accumulator devices. They may store power for several hours.'

We cheered.

Of course a project like the one introduced by Mr. Jamison was going to take its time, even with a competent team of pupils such as Quinn Pensky, Melinda Crenshaw, and Wayne Gilbert.

The following night had thus been forced to manage without additional power supplies.

And the regular power sources had broken down exactly in the moment predicted by Mr. Jamison.

That was totally impressive.

Ryan was of course totally disappointed. He lie in his lounge, moaning, _I was so close to breaking the record highscores in __PacRats__, held by one super hyper mega hot babe named Sasha Striker_[_9:2_]_._ He started to swoon.

'Dream on,' said True.

I grinned and explained Mr. Jamison's plans for solar cells on the roof of the dormitory blocks..

Ryan was looking forward to that day.

I also found two tents at the margin of the campus.

Those temporary housings belonged to Chase Matthews and Michael Barret.

Those freaks had spent the night outside their dormitory due to their inability to bear the hell of a noise caused by Logan's hifi devices.

Chase was still disappointed of Zoey and her — nowadays long distance — boyfriend Stu. He had messed it all up by attacking Glen Davis in front of Zoey's eyes. Now he had got a hard time making up for that and becoming friends again with Zoey.

We were going to help him.

But the sting of a disappointed crush was stuck deep in the flesh of Chase's self-consciousness.

Was he ever going to recover?

**Chapter 10 True Class President**

During our first year at _Pacific Coast Academy_, we girls had been new and unknown.

For that reason, all of our class presidents had been boys, just as during all the years of boys-only _Pacific Coast Academy_.

For example, Ryan's brother Stu had been class president of his year until graduation.

But this year, things may have changed.

I was totally excited when our homeroom teacher, Mr. Toplin, announced the upcoming elections for class presidency.

I knew whom to suggest. I raised my hands. 'True Jackson for president!'

True was consternated. 'What? I'm not ready for that…' But she accepted anyways, albeit grudgingly.

Ryan supported my suggestion.

Of course, True was not going to be the only canditate.

Viviana Martinez had been suggested right after True.

Being roomies, this was going to lead to quite a few troubles, or so I believed…

We were back to our rooms.

Ryan offered hiomself as True's campaign manager.

Viviana grinned. 'Listen, True, just because we are competing for class presidency doesn't mean we're now enemies.'

True sighed. 'You're right, that would be so silly.'

They shook hands.

Alas , Ryan wasn't content with that agreement. 'Hey, it's a campaign, and campaigns consist in spreading ugly rumours about your component.'

I gasped. 'Ryan! Viviana has never done anything bad to you.'

Ryan scratched his chin.

Dustin and Leroy stormed our dorm. 'Hey, what's up?'

I boasted about True going to be voted class president.

Dustin grinned. 'I have to compete with Leroy.'

I choked. 'Too bad for you…'

Dustin asked, 'OK, Lulu, tell me a few dirty things about him…'

I was shocked.

Dustin chuckled. 'It was a joke.'

Leroy nodded.

Dustin reported, 'by the way, my sister runs for presidency in her class, and that's not easy. Logan does not want girls to be class presidents.' He sighed. 'He sponsors now Mark del Figgalo's electorial campaign.'

We coughed. _Nobody was going to vote del Figgalo voluntarily!_

'Logan is such a jerk,' boomed True.

'But he's so hot,' replied I painfully.

True glared aghast.

Ryan shrugged. 'I know. He paid me 500 bucks for becoming True's electorial manager and mess it up, thereupon going to take over and get elected for class presidency.'

True and I, we were thoroughly consternated. 'You did what?'

Ryan grinned. 'I accepted. I need the bucks for a new skateboard.'

I bellowed, 'and you dare to tell us about it?'

Ryan shrugged. 'Logan hasn't paid me for keeping my mouth shut. And you're my best friends, so…'

I banged my head against True's bed. _Backstabbing ain't the way to treat your "best friends", is it?_

Ryan sighed.

Viviana had not said anything since Dustin's and Leroy's entry. Now she stammered, 'I'm going to resign from my postulancy for class presidency.' She went totally pale.

True said, 'what? You can't do that!'

Viviana was of a different opinion.

True sighed. 'Winning because of the lack of other canditates is pointless.'

I shrugged. 'You would be a cool class president, anyways.'

Dustin and Leroy nodded.

'Hey, I could canditate against you,' remarked Ryan, 'Logan will even sponsor my campaign!'

True choked. 'Your still my manager!'

Ryan shrugged helplessly. 'You don't need a manager without a competitor.'

True scratched her chin.

Ryan boasted, 'where did yiou ever see a class president able to do this…' He jumped aloft, performed a perfect somersault, and ended up gracefully on his feet. He bowed deeply.

I was flabbergasted. 'He must have practised a lot during the vacations…'

True sighed deeply. 'If it has to be… I start believing the whole class presidency is one big cheat. Dean Rivers does whatever he's up to doing, no matter what.'

I didn't want to agree, but I was nowhere near able to argue against her blatant verdict.

Alas, Viviana's withdrawal from her postulancy was totally surprising.

She was impossibly afraid of Ryan's competition.

I had to see why. So I asked her in the evening hours.

Viviana sobbed. 'Logan wouldn't like me if…'

I coughed. 'You care what he thinks about you?'

Viviana blushed and nodded. She must have had a terrible crush on Logan.

I did not quite get it. _How could Viviana like someone who obvious thought of her as unworthy?_

Viviana sighed. 'You see, I'm a model, but Logan wants to become a male model.'

I grinned. 'Oh, really?'

Viviana nodded. 'I've made him a list of things to care about when postulating for a vacation as a model. He was quite grateful for that.'

I gasped. 'Doesn't his money open every door for him?'

Viviana had supposed so, too. But she didn't care. 'He's so hot.'

I agreed wholeheartedly.

On the other hand, a jerk was a jerk.

Was there really a way to trust someone like Logan Reese?

Election day…

Dean Rivers was announcing the winners. He had just congratulated Mindy Crenshaw, the new president of the sophomores, who had defeated one Calvin, the coffee vendor. 'We move on to our high school freshman. The canditates were Zoey Brooks and Mark del Figgalo. And the winner is … Zoey Brooks!'

I cheered enthusiastically.

All of Logan's money was not enough to make Mark a credible future class president.

The headmaster passed on to the eightgraders. 'It came down to Jerome Crony versus Eli Pataki[10:1]. And the winner is… Eli Pataki!'

Eli grinned in a typical bimbo boy manner.

Our suspense increased.

Dean Rivers was now talking about my class. 'We had two canditates left… Miss Jackson and Mr. Ryan Laserbeam, a poor excuse of a younger brother to our honorable alumnus Stuart Laserbeam.' He coughed with disgust. 'Oh, Ryan Laserbeam has had the dignity to retire in the last moments.'

I gasped. 'What?'

Ryan stood next to us, and he explained, 'Pinky threatened to play with my nose and to finish me off, should I win.' He trembled all over.

Dean Rivers conclued. 'So, the winner is Miss True Jackson!'

I cheered and applauded. 'Who would have thought of that?'

True shrugged. She was certainly going to be a good president, but she hated to have won this way.

After that, Pinky Turzo was elected president of the sixth graders, defeating some Ben Huebscher[10:2].

The votes between Leroy and Dustin ended with a tie.

Jack had refused to vote and decide for one of his friends.

Thus Dean Ruvers had to announce a tie-break.

Nicole Bristow stepped up to the headmaster and tried to break the tie off his suit.

Dean Rivers grunted, 'hey!'

Zoey defended Nicole. 'Sorry, Sir, the way you said it… he tok it literally.'

Laughing Dean Rivers floundered and almost lost the ground 'neath hi feet. Then he rolled the dice. 'OK, the winner is… Dustin Brooks!'

Dustin grinned. But he also hugged Leroy.

It had been a close call.

But why could Pinky not refrain from stalking Ryan, threatening him with statements like _I'm going to play with your face_ or _I'm going to do you in_? If she liked him, why didn's she just say so?

Oops, that would have been really scary, right?

**Chapter 11 True Jealousy**

Halloween was already gone.

Logan had promised us the horror of our life.

But his haunted mansion was at best mediogre.

Hey, we had fooled him into believing in terrible things going on.

In the end, he ran away screaming.

Ryan had not been with us. He had been hiding from Pinky all the time.

She had — once again — threatend to do him in during Halloween.

I was sitting in the cafeteria for lunch, along with True and Ryan.

Leroy bounded in. 'Hey, sis, True, Ryan, you won't believe it.'

I shrugged. 'Depends?'

Ryan grinned.

Leroy remarked, 'we had science classes today, with Mr. Jamison…'

I nodded.

Leroy continued, 'well… Pinky, or Trisha, whatever, was always causing trouble. So Jamison had to make her sit next to Dustin. He's the favourite of most teachers.'

I had heard so. 'Poor Dustin!'

'I don't think so,' replied my brother.

'What do you want to say?' I panted.

Leroy explained, 'Trisha has kissed Dustin, almost passionately. He's now the coolest guy of the elementary school.'

I was flabbergasted. 'Trisha isn't worthy of him!'

Ryan shrugged. 'Maybe she's now too busy to do me in.' He grinned with excessive relief.

True was also a bit surprised. 'Zoey won't want to hear that. Pinky is such a loose girl, and mean and arrogant and… stuffs.'

I was even more touched by these circumstances. 'How did Pinky kiss him? Tell me the details!'

Leroy glared at me. 'You won't want to know!'

I shivered.

Leroy concluded, 'jealous?'

I blushed. But I had to deny that. 'Hey, he's as old as you… why would…'

True noticed my reaction. But she did not comment on it. She had a hard time to try to forget about it.

But was Leroy right?

Dustin and I, we had been team-mates in the mathletic squad for over a year. We had gone through many things together.

I understood him very well, and vice versa.

We had stood together in La Mesa, at _James K. Polk_ Middle school, facing Albert Wormenheimer and Bernice Livinghocker[11:1], two of the greatest math nerds of our time.

The worminator had scared the living hell out of us.

But we made it to the top, anyways.

We had even defeated _Belleview_ from San Diego, the team around Joshuah Nichols, Mindy Crenshaw, Eric Blonowitz, and Craig Ramirez.

Dustin was so incredibly sweet and smart. His voice made my heart beat at triple speed.

But that was not the same as having feelings for Dustin, was it?

Tell me that it wasn't!

Anyways, someone had to do something about that.

True suggested, 'OK, Ryan, you cross her way muxch too often, anyways, so… next time this happens, tell hwer to stay away from innocent little boys, and to stick to real men, or whatever that's called, who are her peers' She shivered a bit.

Tryan twitched. 'What? She's going to kill me.'

I remarked, 'who will be invited to your funeral?'

True cackled.

Viviana bounded in. 'Hi. Lola just found Chase and Michael in the lounge, covered with an incredible stink. Must have been a skunk. Nothing gets rid of the stench…'

True scratched her chin. 'Mr. Jamison could invent a deodoriser, seven hundred times more efficient than anything yet available.'

I nodded.

Leroy offered to go and inform his science teacher.

We nodded with glee.

I followed Ryan secretly in order to watch him telling Pinky his opinion about the nonsense concerning Pinky and Dustin. I had to hid behind some shrubbery.

Pinky was busy gathering coins from the bottom of the campus well. She greeted Ryan arrogantly, 'hi, toy!'

Ryan grunted, 'hey, I'm not a toy!'

Pinky grinned with disbelief. 'You are!' She grabbed more coins. 'I want people throwing bigger coins into the well.'

Ryan grunted, 'Hey! It isn't nice what you are doing with Dustin!'

Pinky cackled. 'I'm a bad girl, so what?'

Ryan wexplained, 'Zoey won't approve of anyone seducing her little brother. And you better stick to older boys with more experience, not innocent boychilds.'

Pinky smiled. 'Jealous?'

Ryan gasped. 'No, I mean…'

Pinky stood up and approached trembling and shivering Ryan. 'Now you're due. I've told you, I'm going to get you!' She threw her arms around Ryan, pushed him against the next wall, and rubbed her lips gleefully against his mouth.

That was disgusting!

I threw up.

The worst of all:

Ryan started to enjoy that!

Pinky grbbed him. 'Let's fetch my inline skates and your skate board, and then race across the campus.'

Ryan smiled. 'OK!'

I shuld have seen that coming.

It was so cliché, but it seemed to work.

But my nose was hit by some strange smell.

Aw!

That was not the odor of my vomit.

The stupid skunk had covered my pants with an incredible stink, too!

back to my dorm…

Mr. Jamison had actually found a remedy for the stink.

True rubbed me with some icky lotion. 'OK, your odor should normalise within a few hours. By the way… have you got feelings for Dustin? You appeared totally jealous of Pinky when she hit on Dustin.'

I blushed to death. 'Zoey will kill me if…'

True sighed. 'She is certainly overprotective. She many times more jealous of Dustin's girlfriends.'

I choked. 'Hey! They are siblings.'

True shook her head. 'it's another sort of jealousy. The parents living far away, Zoey has also got motherly feelings for Dustin, as you have to a lesser degree for Leroy.'

I nodded.

True continued, 'In Zoey's view, an older girlfriend will take over her motherly tasks. Zoey would feel useless and obsolete, . That's why she loathes particularly older girlfriends of Dustin.'

I sighed with despair.

True nodded. 'Come on, I will talk to Zoey about it.'

I moaned, 'but what if Dustin doesn't like me back?'

True shrugged. 'He certainly likes you in some sense, but how much… just don't rush anything. You need to respect his natural pace.'

I nodded sadly.

This was going to be a hard time.

True hugged me.

I sighed with relief.

Unfortunately, True complained about my skin. 'It feels like sandpaper…'

Michael and Logan had the same problem.

Mr. Jamison's invention had apparently got some side effects on our skins.

But with the help of Quinn and Mindy, the teacher was soon able to fix those problems.

Dustin had been disappointed by Pinky. But what was he now going to do?

His feelings were developing fast.

My heart was going to beat faster every time Dustin moved closer to me.

I was not going to bear that suspense for much longer…

**Chapter 12 True Technology Freaks**

I kept on being too embarrassed to admit to liking a "little boy". Yet I was jumping through blazing hoops in order to be closer to him.

For example, there was the time of an epidemic attack of chicken pocks.

Dustin and Leroy were among the victims. They had been quarantined in the nurse's station.

I was not allowed to visit them, as I had not yet contracted that infection.

Sharon, their new nurse, was nice and attractive.

I was totally jealous of her. In order to upkeep some sort of control of the situation, I got Viviana to paint my face with fake pimples. Thus I was sent to same station, as well.

Too bad, the disease of Leroy and Dustin was really contagious.

Thus I contracted the chicken pox for real.

Ouch!

At the same time, Mr. Jamison and the rest of the science club, now open for girls and boys, was close to completing their project:

The solar batteries were ready to be tested on the roof tops.

The boys were a bit consternated. They had claimed the roof as a girl-free zone.

According to Logan Reese, the worst guy in his biology classes, boys, a s a matter of biological fact, could not be themselves in the presence of girls.

Chase and Michael meekly followed Logan's concept.

Alas, in the end, Logan's wish to reestablish his high-power entertainment station in the boys' lounge.

He swooned in the memory of the first day of the running year, until a power failure stopped them.

Ever since, there had been severe limits on the usage of electronical devices.

Dean Rivers did not want something like that to ever happen again.

Only the solar plant on top of their roof could provide the additional power necessary in order to run Logan's electronic installations non-stop at top volume.

Logan boomed with excessive glee.

Chase and Michael were disappointed. They had hated the infernal noise. Were they going to sleep in tents again?

Of course there were curfews and stuff.

But Logan's bucks bypassed those naughty limitations and restrictions with ease.

Their dorm adviser needed to save money for a new car, thus he welcomed Logan's generous "donations", plastering a fake smile.

Logan paid for patenting the improved Solar technology, holding now all exclusive rights.

The technology was now called _Sologan_.

That sounded ugly.

Or so I thought.

This had not been the one and only project of our science club.

They were also working on remote-controlled battle robots

There was even a league for those beasts in which our school's team participated.

Without Mr. Jamison's superhuman efforts making Quinn, Mindy, and Firewire's gang work closely together, the team would not have been anywhere near competitive.

But the cooperation of those genius technology freaks allowed our team to make it into the state finals.

The task, aslas, was not going to be an easy one.

In the semi-finals, the team of _Belleview_ had beaten the living hell out of _James K. Polk_.

And the latter were represented by no other than self-claimed cyborg "Cookie" Simon Nelson Cooke, more of a robot than of a man, and his henchmen Albert Wormenheimer amd Lisa Zemo.

Our team was represented by Quinn Pensky, Wayne "Firewire" Gilbert, and Quinn Pensky.

For Mindy, this was her first encounter with pupils from her old school since her expulsion.

She was thus thrice as much excited.

The crown of the excitement:

The team of _Belleview_ consisted of Eric Blonowitz, Craig Ramirez, and Joshuah Nichols.

Mindy had had a crush on her eternal runner-up, but she had not been able to fess up because of Josh sticking like glue to his dumb step-brother Drake.

Josh had even defended Drake at aforementioned honor council, thusly enforcing Mindy's expulsion from _Belleview_.

So, after all, for Mindy it was no less than _payback day_.

Pasadena, _Olympic Hall_.

Joshuah Nichols was a dork, but Eric and Craig were even dorkier.

Eric's deadpan humour was terrifying, but way less terrifying than their battle android with built-in sensor-driven rocket launcher.

Our android, on the other hand, looked totally cute.

Zoey, Crony, and True had given it some fashionable outfit.

The android featured coherent laser beams.

Ryan pretended proudly, 'those things have been named on my behalf!'

I giggled my hindside off.

The umpire was Mr. Sweeny from _James K. Polk_. He was saying a few boring words.

I sat down in the spectator's segment.

Dustin and Leroy were not sitting far from me.

In addition, I saw Megan again. 'Hi Megs!'

She grinned. 'Hi. You'ree also watching the war of boobs?'

I smiled. 'Maybe?'

Megan giggled.

I watched the "gladiators" marching in.

Megan took her oboe and started playing some tune.

'Cool intrument,' I remarked, 'is it a clarinet?'

Megan corrected me.

I wished to be able to play something cool, too.

Calm boys like Dustin sure appreciate it.

I asked, 'what is the most romantic of all instruments?'

Megan scratched her chin. 'Probably the violin.'

There were violinists[12:1] and cellists[12:2] at our school.

Maybe I should have just tried to learn to play something like that?

Mr. Sweeny opened the battle.

Mindy and Josh glared at each other.

Josh twitched and boasted, 'this time, I won't be the runner up!'

Eric operated the remote control. He was up to launching a rocket.

Josh boomed triumphantly, 'take that, Creature!'

The nick _creature_ for Mindy Crenshaw had been coined by Drake Parker.

Mindy grinned silently.

Firewire operated our remote control. He pushed a button, creating a holographic lookalike of our engine.

Eric's rocket got distracted and hit the fake android.

Well, there was nothing to hit.

The rocket just dashed through the illusion, hitting the ground and blowing a hole of a radius of over three foot.

Craig tried to fix it, arguing with Eric over the various buttons. Then he tried to take over the remote control.

Josh had to comment on the whole thing. But he just ended up twitching and squealing.

Quinn whispoered a few words into firewire's ears.

Firewire activated the death laserbeam.

Ryan jumped aloft. 'yeah, I've inspred this gadget!'

Eric and Craig lost control over their controlling device.

The android of Bushwell got stuck in the large hole created by aformentioned meteor strike.

Mindy stuck both of her thumbs down, a signal for Wayne.

A deadly ray shot forth and impaled the hostile android like a stuck hippopotamus.

Josh's team gave up.

Megan congratulated me. 'The boob needed that lesson. Next year, he will be a lot better.'

I smiled.

Megan remarked, 'so, what's going on between you and Dustin?'

I blushed to death. But I could not fess up.

Megan shrugged. 'OK, boys can be terse. But you will sure make it. Just tell me in advance. I want to play the oboe at your wedding.' She chuckled mercilessly.

I was totally embarrassed. _Was Megan seeing it the right way?_ I watched Mindy and Firewire.

Mindy grinned. 'I've told you, those dummies fall for each lame trick.'

Firewire just cackled manically.

Mindy commanded Firewire, 'Now kiss me, you dweeb!'

Firewire shivered like crazy when he approached Mindy's face with his own.

It must have been part of a bet.

Or was that real affection between the two of them?

We onlookers cheered fanatically.

Alas, Megan predicted also that her cousin Paige from Colorado[12:3] was able to build much more powerful things.

We needed to stay tuned.

**Chapter 13 True Love**

Dustin had still not noticed what was going on. For that avail, he had asked Logan to teach him the art of impressing girls.

This could not go well.

Leroy told me the details.

Logan was going to smear Dustin's hair with some lotion, making him look cooler. Then he was going to teach him to treating girls "appropriatelt".

According to my painful experiences, this meant nothing but treating girls like dirt.

Dustin was absolutely not the kind of guy to behave in Logan's ways.

In the end, Logan was going to test Dustin;s skill in a double date with the Baldwin sisters.

Tracy Baldwin was a sophomore, thus probably Logan's choice for the double date. But she hated jerks, or so I have heard.

Maybe that was even going to be funny.

Sandy Baldwin, a roomie of Pinky Turzo, was, on the other hand, probably going to be Dustin's partner.

Dustin had recently tried to hit on Wendy[13:1], the third roomie of the same hall.

But Wendy was nowhere near interested. She was only caring for one boy named Drake Parker, aforementioned teenage rock idol.

I lay on my bed, whimpering desperately. _Why did Dustin try to impress mindlessly the wrong girls, when there was one girl that he had already impressed to death?_

Viviana found me in this room. She giggled. 'My sister Lola is now pretending to date Chase Matthews. She wants to learn to kiss dweebs for the screen.'

I coughed. 'Isn't that really mean?'

Viviana shrugged. 'Maybe it is…'

I sighed deeply. Then I told Viviana about Logan's stupid plans for Dustin.

She was not very much impressed.

But I suggested her to come with me and watch Logan and Dustin from the bushes.

My last visit inside the shrubberies had left me with a skunk's mark on my clothes.

We were now a lot more careful.

Quinn was practising with her trombone. She pretended to be great, but she couldn't yet impress many people.

I hoped to be better once I started to play the violin. I wanted to be able to play at least like Niccolò Paganini, whoever that was.

Quinn asked Dustin, 'what do you think about my performance?'

Dustin shrugged. 'There may be better things, but also worse things.' He listened secretly to operas.

Or so told me my brother.

I grinned.

Quinn was totally upset.

Alas, Dustin had just been honest. And he was experienced enough to judge it.

Taking it ill was Quinn's fault, not down to Dustin's arrogance.

Logan praised Dustin, and they moved on.

There were the Baldwin sisters.

Logan treated them like dirt, just as usual.

Dustin, on the other hand, praised Sandy for her choice of outfit. He had understood that insulting girls was the wrong way.

Logan did not want to watch a "chick flick" with the girls. He hated those movies. He oredered the girls to pay for the movie.

Tracy lost her patience and pushed Logan into the fountain. She called that _Jerk In The Fountain_.

Vivian was sad. She left the shrubbery. 'Logan, no!' She grabbed her wet hero and pulled him into safety. 'What have they done to your outfit?'

Logan was consternated. 'Vibiana? Where have you come from?'

I left the bushes, too, admiring Dustin now even more than ever. 'You were great, sweetie!' _oops! What was that?_ I blushed to death.

Dustin stammered, 'you called me _sweetie_?' Now he had to blush, too.

I panted heavily. 'Sorry…'

Sandy poked Dustin. 'Lulu must be totally into you.'

Dustin went pale. He was ashamed for never noticing that. He had not been able to see in me anything but the sister of his roomie, inspite of us having grown incredibly close.

I sobbed.

Dustin wrapped his arms around me. 'Oh Lulu, why haven't you told me earlier?'

I wondered, 'is it too late?'

Dustin shook his head and huggled me closer.

Sandy grinned. But she was sad due to having started to like Dustin.

I shrugged. 'You're as old as my little bro, but I don't care.'

And there he was. Leroy stumbled upon us. He must have been looking for Dustin. He was apparently pleased to see me and Dustin hand in hand.

I sighed with utter relif.

Many little brothers would have been hurt in such a situation.

Tracy shrugged. 'Sandy, do you want to go home?'

Sandy sighed.

Leroy suggest, 'how about a double date, Lulu and Dustin, Sandy and myself?'

Sandy beamed. 'Sorry, sis, I'm busy!'

Tracy smiled and walked away.

We walked to the cinema in order to watch aformentioned movie. We shared our money in order to buy tickets.

The movie was cool.

I was glad to be now with Dustin. But I was worried about Zoey's possible reactions. And I pitied Chase.

The bushy guy was still not over having flunked everything with Zoey.

And Lola's way of using him was not unlikely to rub salt into his wounds.

But I lacked the guts to warn him.

Alas, the word about me and Dustin having found together had been spread fast.

I was now back in my dorm.

True had already talked to Zoey. 'She was consternated. But she allows you to date Dustin, because you are so not like Pinky. But there are certain rules… No making out and stuffs… and you have to give Dustin a solemn promise.'

I sighed. _Zoey was never going to make it easy. But Dustin was worth it._ 'Oh, have you seen Pinky and Ryan, as of lately?'

True shrugged. 'They are now in the skating team. They have to train hard. Don't worry about them for a while!'

Viviana entered our dorm, too. 'OK, Logan and I, we are now sort of a couple. And as long as we are together, he won't hit on other girls. Promised.'

I asked, 'but what is your sister doing with Chase?'

Vivian explained, 'I don't quite get it. She can't stand his capital vegetation, but she still doesn't trash him. Something's going awry.'

I shrugged cluelessly. _Maybe she just pittied him for one reason or the other. Who cared anyways?_

**Chapter 14 True Spring Break**

Spring break was in front of us.

Unfortunately, Dustin was going to spend this time in the summer residence of the Reese family in Santa Barbara county, along with Zoey, Nicole, Quinn, Lola, Chase, Logan, and Michael.

I was doing my suitcase for a trip to New York, along with True and Ryan.

The door opened.

Viviana just let Zoey in.

Zoey grinned. 'OK, I think we should trade places over spring break, shouldn't we?'

I gasped. 'Really?'

Zoey nodded solemnly. 'It will bwe sort of a honeymoon trip for you and Dustin.'

I blushed for being duly embarrassed.

Zoey explained, 'likewise, I will go to New York for an exposition of Harry Joiner and Stu.' She jumped excitedly up and down.

I beamed. 'Cool!'

A limousine was going to take us to Santa Barbara.

We waited in front of the student drop area.

Zoey's flight to New York was only going to be the next day.

She was, of course, still trying to patronise us until the very last minute. Alas, she was up to something else.

A few moments later, Megan Parker appeared around the corner. 'Hi, Lulu!'

I coughed.'Megan?'

She unwrapped her oboe. 'OK, I've told you to let me know…'

I stammered. 'We're still ten years or so away from getting married.'

Dustin was flabbergasted.

Megan shrugged. 'Promise party!'

Dystin and I, we glared at each other.

Megan grinned, 'Sandy Baldwin's cousin goes to _Belleview_ with me.[14:1] She told me everything!'

I coughed terribly.

Zoey gave us a little box with a bow on it. 'OK, these are your promise rings. Time for exchanging them!'

So, these were the solemn promises I had to do in order to be allowed to date Dustin.

Zoey was really thoroughgoing!

Megan played the oboe — _Briadal Chorus_ from Wagner's opera _Lohengrin_.

Leroy and Sandy sang along.

* * *

Faithful and True  
We lead ye forth  
Where Love triumphant  
Shall crown ye with joy

* * *

I didn't know what to say.

Dustin was equally shocked.

The limousine was finally making its way around the last corner. But it had to wait until we were done with our promises.

I stammered, 'I promise to have and hold you, Dustin Brooks, whatever, for alaways and ever, and stuff…' I grinned, not secure in the knowledge of the onlookers' expectations.

Dustin puked some similar words.

The chorus went on.

* * *

Star of renown  
Flower of the earth  
Blest be ye both far From all life's annoy

* * *

The audience applauded when we picked our rings and exchanged them solemnly, at least as solemn as possible, given our confusion concerning the whole situation.

Zoey and True had designed those rings for us.

Those were cheap brass ring.

But the symbolic meaning was very high.

We finally entered our limousine.

It was really big.

Alas, Logan was disappointed.

They had apparently got even bigger ones.

But even the smaller ones were totally cool.

Wow, what a residence!

But, according to Logan, their normal house in Beverly Hills was even a whole lot bigger.

And our rooms?

They were even greater than our dormitories at school.

Of course I shared a room not with Dustin, but with Lola, Nicole, and Quinn.

This trip to Santa Barbara was not just some spring vacation.

Malcolm Reese announced the true reason: 'Well, you're going to be the test players of my new game show _Gender Defenders_. Two teams — four boys and four girls — will compete each time for the final trophy. The winning team of this test session will make it into the pilot during this spring.'

I squealed. I so wanted to say something in TV.

Lola, of course, wanted the same thing even more, being an aspiring Hollywood star, and stuff.

We should have seen that coming.

The king of Hollywood won't invite a bunch of kids for no reason.

I was totally excited.

The next morning, Dustin and I felt strangely energised.

Quinn explained, 'you must have stolen my Frazz!'

_Frazz_ was the name of some blue softdrink she had invented, along with Mindy and Mr. Jamison.

It increased our vital forces by a factor of like seven hundred!

We could duly use it for the trials in front of us.

The first trial was a hunt for cryptic hints hidden throughout the estate.

We girls were able to win this trial.

Did you know that milk is the juice of a cow? Wow!

In the second trial, we had to soup up the outfits of certain nerds, one Marty Felsenburg and one Nelson Pernell.

The two of them even topped Eric Blonowitz.

But ebough of that.

With Zoey or True, we would have won with ease.

But without them, the boys beat us even here.

This was a tie after two trials.

The final trial was going to decide.

Chase and Lola had to stand each on an island in the estate's pool, trying to sweep the other off his feet and into the water.

In the end, the boys won because Lola slipped on her high-heeled shoes.

But, inspite of Malcolm's announce, this had not just been a test, it was the pilot of the show _Gender Defenders_!

In other words, we were going to be seen in game channel.

Now I was even more excited.

A few weeks later, we watched the première of the game show in our lounge.

True remarked, 'I don't trust the thing between Chase and Lola. It is way too conspicious. As much as Lola uses him in order to practise acting, Chase uses Lola in order to punish Zoey.'

I gasped.

This was a very brash accusation.

Neither of them was a nice thing to do.

Zoey appeared not to care. She was incredibbly happy for having seen Stu's first exposition.

But where was this going to end up?

**Chapter 15 True Mount**

The high school kids used to hang out at _Sushi Rox_ even after our curfew.

This was unfair.

One day, we girls were already half the way asleep.

But then the bells rang out.

Panic seized the kids on the campus.

I stuck my head through the window.

There were no clouds in the sky.

But rain kept on pouring down upon me.

True supposed, 'was that Mr. Jamison's and Quinn Pensky's new sprinkling? 700 time faster than the old one?'

I gasped.

But what had triggered the sprinklers?

Next morning, I slithered into Ryan's lounge.

He yawned heartily.

Ryan's dorm was closer to _Sushi Rocks_ than mine.

Ryan had been awake much longer. He explained, 'Zoey and her friends have inadevertedly set _Sushi Rox_ ablaze. And the sprinklers reacted on site …'

Alas, now the whole campus was muddy.

Coco complained about her underwear. It had been left on outside her apartment in order to dry, but it was now more wet than ever before.

There was another great invention made by Quinn under the auspieces of Mr. Jamison.

Dean Rivers, like all chairtooting office studs, was too lazy to stand up and do little, distracting things. He preferred to sit in his chair and command others around.

But there were — at least usually — not enough people in his office to receive his orders.

For that avail, our technology freaks had invented an automated office machine controlled by the voice of our worshipped headmaster.

Today, time had come for a test run.

We were sitting in our lounge in order to watch a live report from the office of Dean Rivers.

Quinn was up to selling the same system to other schools.

For example, Principal Brandywine from _Rocky Road_ in Pennsylvania was even more lazy. She was already using a chair with wheels and a motor in order to take her around in the building.

The office machine here on the campus was going to be powered by Jamison's solar plants.

Jeremiah Trottman, the star reporter of PCA news channel, opened the session.

Mr. Jamison started introducing the apparatus. 'If you need a pointy pencil, just say so..'

'Pencil,' stammered the headmaster.

A tentacle shot forth, grabbed a ballpoint pen, tried to point it, and handed the ugly mess unto Dean Rivers.

The headmaster was flabbergasted.

We laughed our living butts off.

Inspite of having come up with a respectable invention, Quinn was not too happy.

She held several illegal pets at this school.

But her biggest pet, an alpaca named Otiz, had to stay behind in Seattle. It was totally sad.

This circumstance also depressed Quinn's mood to no end.

We saw only two possibilities: Make Otis come to _PCA_, or send Quinn home to Seattle.

The first "solution" vialeted the strict prohibition of pets in a way much harder to hide than keeping a little cat or so.

The second "solution" — in the middle of spring term — would have got Quinn suspended.

Maybe we could effect a special permission from Dean Rivers?

The boss should have been glad about the new voice-driven office machine.

I followed Zoey into the admin building.

Two lads in white passed us at the speed of light.

We were consternated. _What had happened?_

Beverly, the headmaster's secretary was still very excited.

The hospital's envoys carried away some guy.

We recognised him. 'Executive Chairman Berman?'

Beverly nodded sadly.

Garth Berman was very popular among the pupils.

This made us totally sad.

Beverly explained, 'Berman likes to dress as a clown in order to pull a prank on Rivers. The headmaster told Berman to put the clown's costume into a box and seal it safely away.'

We shrugged cluelessly.

Beverly continued, 'that damn' voice-driven machine understood the word _box_ the wrong way. A boxing mitten appeared from the ceiling and knocked Berman out.'

I would have loved to chuckle mercilessly. But I pitied Garth, the best of all exceutive chairmen.

Dean Rivers was now looking for a substitute for Berman. 'OK, only the treasurer of our school's board is able to sub for him. Bradford has now hired a new treasuerer for us, Mrs. Rose Pinchbinder.[15:1]'

This sounded no good.

Rivers was now apparently not in the mood of granting Quinn any sort of exception.

We were now looking foranother way to garrison Otiz.

True and Zoey looked through LA county phone book.

Wasn't there anyone with a big stable, rigged and ready to host Otiz?

True's shoes were really muddy.

Ryan was ordered to polish them.

The campus ground outside was still one naughty quagmire.

Suddenly, a megaphone was activated.

Dean Rivers thundered across the campus, 'why is there no swampwalk command in Quinn Pensky's and Mr. Jamison's invention? A kingdom for a mount!'

True choked. 'A mount?'

I sighed. 'I've often dreamt about a talking pony …'

True shook her head. 'Maybe it's posible to ride Quinn's alpaca?'

I gasped.

True called immediately the administration office.

"Miraculously", Dean Rivers gave the permit to bring Otiz to the ground, as long as the campus was still morassy.

Dustin walked in and huggled me. 'Sweety, do you know that Megan has got a zebra?[15:2]'

I coughed.

Dustin explained, 'But their house is too narrow for it, so it lives on the ranch of Fay Dunnaway[15:3], not far from here!'

True concluded, 'yeah, that's it! We will get a stable for Otiz at the ranch of Fay Dunnaway after the summer break i.e. when the campus was dry again. That means: No more depression!'

I grinned. 'Does Fay Dunnaway also have a talking pony?'

True glared at me with dismay.

We stationed the alpaca in one of the stables.

But Otiz was not alone there.

A pony looked at mee … not just a pony … a talking pony. It sang about its love for pancakes.

I sang along.

Dustin and I, we started learning to ride the talking pony whenever Quinn was visiting Otiz.

* * *

**Part III  
Third Season**

* * *

**Chapter 16 True Consternation**

It was the first day of our third year at the _Pacific Coast Academy_.

Stuart halted his craft right at the student drop in order to let us exit. He was probably going to see Zoey as soon as possible.

Ryan had promised to help us with our luggage.

Alas, Trisha crossed our way, turning Ryan's promise into ashes blown away with the wind.

I sighed truly.

Walking on, we noticed Chase.

But the bushy head was not alone. He walked hand in hand with no other than … Trina Vega, aka Rebecca.

I was close to puking.

True grunted, 'has Chase fallen so low?'

I sighed deeply. 'He has now totally overdone his game with punishing Zoey. And that's all Stu's fault.'

True panted thoroughly and shuddered with dismay.

Finally, we reached out dorm.

Viviana was our third roomie also for this year. Being Trina's cousin, she may have known more about that disgusting relationship between Trina and Chase.

True asked Viviana about that topic.

The fledgling supermodel replied, 'apparently, the whole thing is as fake as can be. Trina, or Rebecca, whatever, hates bushy hair.'

True shruugged.

'I knew it,' declared I.

Vivian nodded. 'Either she uses Chase in order to hone her non-existing acting skills, or she's hired just for making Zoey feel miserable. If not both …'

True nodded. 'In any case, it stinks!'

I sighed with disgust.

I was now looking for Dustin.

Leroy had talked about the beach.

Thus I decided to go there. But I didn't get very far when I was almost hit by a swarm of bees.

The buzzing insects were following Coco Wexler and an open can of ravioli. They were obviously attracted by the sauce.

Coco was too obstinate to throw the can away.

I tried to tell her to give up on them.

But it was too late.

Coco was stung badly. She had to be brought to the nurse's station.

According to Dr. Nussbaum[16:1], Coco had to go through some surgery.

Zoey was consternated. 'Don't we have to tell her mother?'

Dr. Nussbaum shrugged helplessly.

Coco asked, 'can't you tell my sister Evvy instead? She's the culprit of my addiction to ravioli!'

True shrugged. 'What's her number?'

Coco told Zoey tp go through her handbag.

Zoey rummaged through Coco's belongings, disgusted by most of them.

But there was finally the number of Evelyn Wexler[16:2], cook at a noble restaurant in New York named _Pompanou_[16:3].

Coco had not seen her sister in almost ten years.

That was going to be interesting.

Stu bounded in. He was soon going to return to New York for another exposition. There he was going to contact Evvy. Stu was now shaking hands with Zoey.

True grunted, 'why don't you kiss her as you use to do?'

'And do in Chase's sanity for, which the two of you have already distorted,' I added.

Stu gasped. 'Zoey and have been doing what?'

Zoey looked quizzically.

'Come on,' Icontinued, 'since middle school dance … and you have been together at Stu's prom, and that exposition …'

Stu grunted, 'are you insane? I just introduced Zoey to Harry Joiner, a friend of fashion giants like Max Madigan and Simon Christini.'

I went dizzy. 'What? Who? When? How?'

Zoey glared at us with dismay.

The tide was apparently high.

I dragged Zoey directly to Chase's dormitory block.

She told me about Nicole's departure. 'She's just too boy-craxy for a mixed school.'

I grinned. 'So, Nicole is now going to a boys-only school?'

Zoey shook her head. 'That would be so cool!'

Finally, we reached the dorm of Chase Bartholomew Matthews.

Having opened the door, we saw Chase pulling Rebecca close and sucking forcefully the rotting teeth out of her penetrantly stinky mouth.

Zoey gasped.

I boomed, 'Chase, Trina, you are just faking!'

The fake lovebirds were consternated.

I explained, 'Viviana has told me everything. Chase is absolutely not the type of a boy of Trina's interest.'

Trina sighed bitterly. 'Correct! He hs to pay me one hundred bucks for that. Or do you think … I would never volunteer to kiss such a bushy dweeb.'

Chase shrugged. 'Thanks?'

Zoey gasped. 'Chase! What are you doing?'

I explained, 'Chase had been into you even before crashing against the flag pole. He was so depressed and more and more desperate, especially after you and Stu …'

Zoey shook her head. 'You and your stupid fantasies. Remind you, Stu is 19 years old, while I am only fifteen.'

I looked sheepish.

Chase admitted, 'I've tried to get you jealous, first by using Lola, …'

Zoey boomed, 'and how much do you have to pay her?'

Chase trembled. He stammered, 'Lola started the whole thing. She used me in order to practise kissing ugly boys, for future movie rôles.'

Zoey moaned, 'heaven, crash down on me! What else did you do?'

Chase continued, 'Well, the thing with Lola became no longer believable, so Lola suggested her cousin Trina, or Rebecca, whatever you like most …'

Trina grinned.

Zoey puked on the floor.

'That's Michael's carpet,' protested Chase.

Trina shrugged and walked away. 'I think that was it. You still owe me one hundred bucks, until term break.'

Chase moaned with dismay.

I added, 'so why did you never tell Zoey straight about your feelings?'

Chase sighed. 'I feared her to reject me, and never even talk to me again,' stammered the bushy skull.

Zoey sighed deeply. 'Hey, I might have rejected you for the time being, but without starting to hate you.'

'Really?' Chase looked flabbergasted.

Zoey nodded. She grabbed Chase and pulled him into a kiss.

I coughed and ran away.

They were better left alone.

Stu had now done everything and was ready to return to New York City.

I had to apologise for my stupid fantasies.

The school shrink had told me to suffer from ADHS and from paranoid mood disorder.

Hey, what did he say?

Oops! In this moment, I was crashing carelessly into a new girl at this school.

She was carrying some sculpture made of cotton swabs.

But the whole thing dropped to the floor and broke apart.

The girl started weeping.

It had been her own work, a model of the house of her dreams.

Stu helped her. 'Hey, you are a very gifted sculptress, it seems. I'm an artist too, and might help you with your works.'

'Really?' The girl introduced herself with a lispy voice, 'My name is Stacey Dillsen, and I come from Swampscott, Massachusetts. My sister Susan works as a nurse in Mississippi. I like woodshop and astronomy.'

Stu smiled. 'That's cool. Let's go for a smoothie and talk about it?'

Stacey smiled.

They walked hand in hand to the vendor cart, talking about glue.

I sighed. 'Strange things are going on …'

True giggled merrily.

**Chapter 17 True Jocks**

Dorm adviser Coco Wexler's bad luck kept on growing.

She had just been dismissed from hospital, covered with scars from the bee stings and the surgical knife, when she was trashed by her "boyfriend" Carl.

The latter, a completely dumb and brute jock, was the coach of our totally incompetent baseball team.

Fortunately, Stuart Laserbeam had already contacted Evelyn Wexler.

The star cook was now coming to Los Angeles in order to take care of her younger sister.

But the worst jock at our school was, as usual, the quarterback of the football team.

His name was Vince Blake.

Vince's little sister was an arrogant Hollywood diva named Ashley[17:1]. She gave me the creeps because of her pretentiously aggressive yet subliminally subtle way of checking out on Dustin.

Like all jocks, he was too lazy to do his homeworks. For that avail, he either copied everything from pupils he paid for that, or straight from the teachers' desk.

But nobody was willing to investigate any further.

Upon Vince's arrival, our football team had started being as successful as never before, completely unlike our baseball team.

Getting Vince punished for his cheating would have implied and end of the victorious streak of the team.

And there's no greater way to become unpopular than backstabbing your school's football team just before the state playoffs.

Thus everything done by Vince went through without any trace of a mayhem.

Ryan and his lovergirl Pinky had to cheer for Vince.

Ryan had been voted into the cheerleading squad after performing successfully a backflip on his skateboard.

Alas, Vince did not want any male cheerleaders. Thus he kept on pushing Ryan around for no reason, and on hitting on Pinky.

But Pinky Turzo did not budge from Ryan.

The situation had been grave before the third leg of our football team's match against that of _James K. Polk_.

It was the team of Billy Loomer, boss of the former bully gang of Jerry Crony aka Olivary Biallo.

Jerry needed to hide under cover.

Loomer's skull was tough enough to crack walnuts.

Chase Matthews had been the first to dare to oppose to Vince's immunity. He had caught Vince _in flagrante delicto_ before a test in history.

Vince got suspended.

Now the footballs jerks were most likely to beat him up for that, somewhere in some dark corner at night.

Now, it was night, and we were hiding in a corner.

Suddenly, Chase fled screaming into or lounge.

True and I, we wondered about the situation.

Chase sweated and panted fanatically.

We asked hin to talk.

Chase wiped some steaming and oozing sweat off his face. Finally, he started to stammer, 'five football jocks, lead by Vince … they were so close to beating me up.'

I gasped. 'you escaped?'

Chase nodded. 'in the last moment, a hitherto unknown girl jumped forth from the bushes and beat up all the football oxen.'

Too bad, it was too dark to identify the girl that had saved Chase.

Viviana whispered unto me, 'Lola and I, we have asked our similar-looking cousin Shelby[17:2] to come hereto. We even wanted Dean Rivers to do that officially. But he insisted in hiring an undercover bodyguard for Chase.'

I gasped. 'A secret body guard?'

During the next day, Quinn turned very strange. She was afraid of a girl she had never seen before. Or so she claimed. In other words, Quinn was hiding something.

We wondered what.

The name of the new girl was Sarah Kyla[17:3].

Ryan guessed, 'maybe Quinn is really a Russian spy, and Sarah knows about that?'

I was flabbergasted.

Quinn looked way to naïve for a Russian spy, didn't she? Maybe she feared to lose Mark to Sarah?

But Sarah wasn't really interested in that dweeb.

And Quinn was stressing Mark's confidence to no end by requesting him to never ever talk to Sarah. She must have turned crazy, for whatever reason.

The wrestling championship was around the corner.

This year, the _Pacific Coast Academy_ was going to host it.

Alas, for the better or worse, this meant even more jocks.

Has the touble with expelled Vince Blake not been enough?

I hoped the mystery body guard to be still around, just for all cases.

Ashley Blake was now going to pull any lever in order to make Chase pay for his "capital treason".

Apparently the people in charge were never going to learn.

Jocks cheating in academic tests was certainly a problem at all schools, here or _J.K. Polk's_, _Belleview_, _Palmwoods_. or _Hollywood Art_ didn't make much of a difference.

Vince just happened to have been the one to be caught.

And Chuck Javers, one of the wrestlers expected during the championships, was going to be way worse. He was a totally furious wrestling ox, beating everything standing in his way into oblivion. He has been coached by Jackson Colt[17:4], international maximum weight mixed martial champion for over ten years.

Finally, Sarah Kyla grinned triumphantly in the lounge. She had been watching old videos.

Many of us onlookers could not trust their ears.

Nursery school Quinn had been a pageant girl!

Most of us giggled fanatically.

Alas, Quinn was disappointed. She threatened to leave this school for good.

The news about her past must have been devastating.

But .. so what?

I'm a math genius, but I still like watching faery tale videos where the beauty gets to marry the prince.

Quinn shouldn't have been ashamed of that.

And if Mark had trashed her for that, he wouldn't have deserved her to start with, anyways.

Fortunately, Mr. Jamisson was able to calm Quinn down.

The wrestling championships went by without incidence.

Chuck Javers won everything as expected. But he had not dare to cause mayhem among the spectators. He was apparently afraid of Chase Matthews's mystery bodyguard.

Who was it?

**Chapter 18 True Insanity**

The installation of the solar plant on top of the boys' roof had improved their possibilities of electronic entaintainment quite drastically.

Of course, Logan and his friends did not refrain from using them.

I also liked a few computer games.

But those were role playing games of the sort _princess looks for knight in shining armor_.

These games worked with pretty old hardware as all.

They circled essentially around thinking about strategies to win your prince.

Logan and Chase did not think highly of thinking. They wanted adrenaline-boosters, especially racing games.

These games required optimal reactions and perception.

Ryan, on the other hand, preferred now his skateboard oiver skating games. He was still looking forward to the latter day when he was able to beat his Pinky in a skating race.

I was sitting in my lounge.

Leroy stormed in. 'Lulu!' he sounded totally excited.

I wondered, 'What's up?'

Leroy explained, 'Chase has beaten Logan's high score in a bideo race game.'

I shrugged.

Leroy continued, 'but Logan has now challenged Chase for a race with real carts, around the campus!'

I gasped for dismay. 'That's insane! Pupils could get injured …'

Chase was not even able to steer his bike away from obstacles.

And motor carts were so much faster.

I already saw vehicle crashes, burning motors, bleeding husks of pupils, and so on.

Leroy sighed deeply.

I decided to go to Zoey and ask her to talk some sense into Chase.

Zoey was busy making fun about Stacey . 'She has knotted her legs and strained her butt muscles during yoga classes.' She cackled mercislessly.

I sighed. 'This won't help any further. Chase and Logan are running a murderous bet …'

Zoey gasped. 'What? Why has Michael not told me? Wait, his head is completely inebriated by his crush for Lisa Perkins …'

I moaned, 'some boys just are like that …'

Zoey nodded solemnly. 'Alas, you're right, if Chase is about committing stupidities … wait, what is he up to?'

I told her about the impending car race across the campus.

Zoey gasped. 'Hey, they are totally insane! Chase can't do that. He will hit things worse than flag poles.'

We decided to go to Chase and tell him about the absurdity of his plans.

Chase had not been easy to find.

After asking Mark del Figgalo and Firewire, we knew him in some workshop in the backyard of the campus.

Chase was fumbling with some sort of lawnmower.

Well, it looked like a lawnmower.

But I did not really know.

Zoey walked up to Chase. 'Is that your race cart?'

Chase beamed proudly. 'It used to be a lawnmower, but Quinn has worked on it. She still needs to tune it and turn it into a turbo race cart, with jet propulsion and so on.'

I did not understand.

Should a girl have to worry about that stuff?

Not even Dustin could do something with lawnmowers. He likes playing with toy cars and planes. But he would not dare to repair or even tune these. That he leaves up Quinn, he leaves it all to Quinn.[18:1]

The geek girl was even able to repair real planes.[18:2]

Well, her way of fixing things used not to be without dangerous side effects. I wondered, quotwhat if Quinn leaves out the brakes, just in order to improve the propulsion? Really, I did not quite understand what I was talking about. I just had heard people talking about stuff like that.

Zoey nodded. 'You know in what danger you are going to place yourself, do you? You can't even control your bike well enough to avoid crashing into some pole. How much more will you ruin with your lawnmower? I perfer you alive and in one piece, you know.'

Chase grinned and shook his head. 'I won't ride the car, I've bribed some college boy to do that for me. He'll wear a wig.'

Zoey choked. She grabbed Chase and shook him violently. 'It doesn't matter who or what causes an accident. Many innocent pupils would be endangered. Dean Rivers should not have approved of the race!'

Chase gasped. 'Dean Rivers? What has he got to do with the race?'

Zoey explained, 'he's responsible for the security of the campus, the pupils, the staff, the teachers, and so on. You can't organise something as dangerous as a cart race without te permit of our headmaster!'

Chase shrugged. 'Logan says it's OK. It's just a matter of bucks …'

Zoey grunted, 'no, it isn't! It's a matter of safety.'

Chase looked flabbergasted. He could not really argue against Zoey. 'But … if I withdraw from the race … the stakes are cruel …'

Zoey wondered, 'what stakes?'

Chase replied, 'The loser has to cross the campus in a girl's gown.'

I could not prevent myself from laughing my hindside off.

But it was certianly no fun at all for Chase.

Chase moaned, 'I have once been a flower girl at my uncle's wedding. That was embarrassing. I don't want to go through it again.'

Zoey shook her head.

I had got a stupid idea. 'And what happens in the case of Logan withdrawing ere that?'

Chase looked quizzically.

Zoey nodded. 'That's it! We need Logan, not you, to withdraw.'

Chase grinned fanatically.

But this was not easy to achieve.

It was the day of the cart race.

Chase stood next to his almost tuned lawnmower.

But where was Logan?

True told us the truth about that:

In order to help previously damaged Stacey to recover, Kazu had promised a dinner with Stacey for the winner of the race.

"Miraculously", Logan was, all of a sudden, no longer interested in the contest.

Chase had won the bet without doing anything.

Also, Stacey was waiting for Stu's return.

But Logan had to go through some embarrassing gauntlet …

**Chapter 19 True Vendor Machines**

Sometimes we got hungry between classes.

There were several ways to get at food outside the opening times of the cafeteria.

There was a coffee cart run by jerk Calvin.

But the queues in front of the cart grew too fast.

It was usually easier to fix something from the vendor machines in the lounges or sll over the campus square.

But not everyone was pleased by the supplies.

Zoey Brookes complained insanely much about unhealthy snacks. She feared especially for Dustin getting too many of them, especially some sort of coloured sugar balls.

Dean Rivers had always refused to offer other things than those that sold best. He was probably making money with those vendor machines.

Alas, there had hitherto been no way for us to prove it.

Zoey had ordered so-called moon bars from New England.

Those bars were fat-free and sugar-free.

But they tasted abominable.

No pupil with a normal taste was willing to consume them.

Quinn had been able to improve their taste significantly by means of injection of some extract of a rare castus found in Mexico. She had snuck those bars into the vendor machines by making some refill worker pass out.

The upgraded moonbars had become popular very fast.

Even Dean Rivers started approving of them.

But there were two drawbacks:

First, the cactus extract was highly addictive, comparable to cocaine or marijuana.

Second, there was not enough of it available.

After a few days, the fluid ran out, leaving a bunch of zombie pupils.

There were now two possibilities:

One of them was that of sending a field mission to Guadalapexo.

The second option was developing an artificial version of the cactus extract.

Quinn, Mr. Jamisson, Mindy, and Firewire worked busily on the latter alternative.

Zoey, Lola, Chase, and Michael planned a field trip to the desert of Guadalapexo.

In the meantime, the old and unhealthy snacks had to fill the vendor machines again.

Fruit doodle cakes were particularly in fashion.

Lola Martinez loved raspberry flavoured ones most. Walking the campus, she saw a vendor machine, chock full with doodle cakes. She opened her wallet, took a buck, and inserted it into the slot. Having typed the correct number, she pushed a button.

But the cake was stuck half way.

Likewise, no money was returned.

Lola was excessively disappointed. She punched the machine for absolutely no avail whatsoever.

Quinn wanted to kick the thing. But she was much too weak for that avail.

Too bad Lola's cousin Shelby was not around. The martial artist would have choped and kicked the evil machine into smithereens.

Alas, Mr. Thatcher, our grumpy vice principal, was upset.

The only legal way to get our money back was filing a comoplaint to the administration office and so on.

Such a complaint would have required several weeks of approval.

But Lola was hungry right here, right now.

I noticed the situation.

Ryan had got an idea. 'A simple hockey stick will prove useful here.'

True tried hard to dissuade Ryan.

Dustin offered to stick his hand into the ejection slot and grab the cake.

That would have made my prince extremely cool.

But Dustin might have broken his arm.

So I did not encourage him to do so.

Instead, Ryan used his hockey stick as a lever and cranked the machine's front door open.

Pinky skated past us and applauded her loverboy fanatically. 'Super Ryan! This vendior machine is a toy!'

Ryan beamed with excessive pride. 'This is Ryan Superman, the saviour of damsels in distress!'

Smiling Lola grabbed swiftly he doodle cake. 'Now you won't escpe me anymore! Nothing is going to stop me from devouring you alive.' With grim determination, she dug her teeth into the cake. Wait, she had forgotten to remove the plastic wrapper.

Ouch!

This did not taste too well.

Lola was close to puking.

Unfortunately, Mr. Fetcher had been approaching. Thus he had caught Ryan _in flagrante delicto_.

Needless to say, this meant serious trouble.

Ryan was condemned to 4 weeks of detention and undusting dry blackboard sponges.

One more fraud like this would have possibly effected Ryan's expulsion.

We were now mightily mad at the vendor machines.

Someone had to do something about them.

Ryan supposed them to be Russian spies.

Upon having heard about Ryan's detention, Stu arrived on the campus. He was also looking after Stacey, checking her previously injured butt. He had to talk some serious words to his little brother. But he was also suspicious. 'There's something rotten in the state of these vendor machines!'

Quinn had even convinced Mr. Jamisson.

The science teacher decided to request an official examination of the program controlling the vendor machines.

Rivers and Thatcher denied the request.

So we had to get the permission from someone standing above them.

The next one up in the hierarchy was the board, under the custody of Garth Berman.

Garth was finally back in his office after having been knocked out by the office machine.

Mr. Jamisson, True, Zoey, and I had requested an audience with him. We entered his office and greeted the big guy.

Garth grinned. 'So, there are problemsd with those vendor machines?'

Zoey nodded solemnly and told the executive chairman about Lola's excruciating misery.

Berman grunted, 'those are severe accusations. Butm yes, the request is granted. But be quick, before Mr. Bradford finds out!'

We grinned and thanked him.

It took our tech freaks just a few hours to figure a scandal.

Quinn explained, 'a random generator lets something like Lola's mishap occur every once in one hundred usages.'

I was consternated. I was a fast calculator and calculated the expectable profirt of the vendor machines.

Zoey gasped. She had to inform Garth Berman on site.

Mr. Jamisson had spread the outcome of his stern observations unto Garth Berman.

The executive chairman was consternated. He would not have believed it. But he had also read the report of Rosemary Pinchbinder, our treasurer during his absence. 'Pinchbinder has noticed several inaccuracies in the financial reports. And much of it has to do with frenchised services in general.'

We gasped deeply.

Further scrutiny confirmed our initial guess:

Dean Rivers and Vice Dean Thatcher were profiting from the scandal. They had manipulated the machines for that purpose.

The responsible culprits were suspended on site.

Mr. Bender was assigned as substitute dean for a few weeks.

Berman was going to try to employ some Mr. Taylor from Harvard as a new dean.

Likewise, Mr. Jamisson and Quinn were going to reprogram the vendor machines, preventing further obnoxious incidents.

And the research for an improvement of those bone dry moon bars went on and on and on …

**Chapter 20 True Scream**

Quinn had been working for weeks on bacteria able to transform molasses into some substance comparable to the juice of the cactus of Guadalapexo. Unfortunately, she left her test tubes and matrasses standing open in their dormitory room. She was also worried about a girl named Maria Hughes[20:1].

Maria was apparently hanging out a lot with Quinn's consort Mark Del Figgalo.

The latter had not yet given any good reasons for that, only scapegoats and white lies.

That was understandable.

I would have done the same in the case of Dustin hanging out with other girls and refraining from giving me good reasons.

The worst possible scenario would have been that of Dustin hanging out with True.

Fortunately, my little sweetie never dared to commit such a fraudulent perversity.

Naturally, Quinn was totally nervous and had a hard time concentrating on her experiments.

According to Viviana, Lola was practising for a rôle in the cast of a new show by Malcolm Reese. for that avail, she had to squeal a lot.

Crossing the campus during Lola's practice sessions was terrible.

Most pupils tended to startle insanely.

Chase, for example, slammed with his bike against the next tree.

Stacey Dillsen dropped yet another cotton swab model and started weeping with excruciating sorrow.

Stacey's desperate cries even fortified the effects of Lola's sophisticated squeal.

Dustin and I, we decided to sit down on a bench until the end of the whole horror trip.

We were holding hands tightly for several minutes.

Now there had been no squeal in two minutes.

We thought about continuing our walk.

All of a sudden, Dustin's phone rang out.

He picked it up. 'Dustin Brooks … oh, hi Zoey!' He shrugged.

Zoey explained, 'I can't get into my dorm. Quinn has startled upon Lola's squeal and spilled a test tube on accident. She had to trigger ABC alert and inform the bureau for biological hazards. Now she's quarantined, _Brenner Hall_ gets evacuated. May I sleep in True's and Lola's dormitory?'

Dustin looked at me,

I sighed. 'True should be OK with it.' I didn't mind.

Everything was weird, anyways.

Back to my dorm.

Alas, Lola was here, too. She was equally locked out of her dorm.

Viviana had allowd her favourite relative to stay here as long as necessary.

Now it was going to be narrow in here.

But we were going to put up with it.

My cellular phone rang.

I picked it up. 'Lulu … Oh, Ryan, what's up? Have you heard about the accident?'

Ryan sighed. 'Unfortunately. I've phoned Stu and told him about it, and he forces me to ask you to host Stacey. She's cut off her own dormitory room, too.'

Lola screamed again, but this time for real. She was going to die for that.

But we could not disappoint Stu.

Zoey was now really mad at Lola and her screams.

Ten minutes later, Stacey walked in, complete with her demolished cotton swab sculpture. But she had no glue to fix it. 'I had to leave it in my dorm.'

Was that good or bad?

Dustin's phone rang again.

He picked it up.

It was Quinn. She expected Dustin to go and spy Mark and Maria.

My sweetheart asked, 'what's in it for me?'

Zoey grunted.

But Dustin did not care.

Quinn and Dustin negotiated. They finally agreed on twenty bucks.

I followed Dustin as his assistant spy.

We snuck carefully across the campus, kneeling now right behind Mark and Maria.

The girl stared dreamily deep into Mark's eyes and compared them to sparkling diamonds.

Mark was so going to cheat on Quinn.

That was totally mean.

Then Mark and Maria started talking about going to _Sushi Rox_.

Dustin grinned. 'Do you think they will have a candle light dinner?'

I shivered. 'You have to tell Quinn!'

Dustin sighed and nodded. He picked up his mobile phone.

We followed the lovebirds and snuck into _Sushi Rocks_. We were able to hid 'neath the table next to that of Mark and Maria. We were rigged and ready to record them making out and send the photoes straight to Quinn.

But nothing like that happened.

Maria cintinued talking about the perfect shape of Mark's nose, and the harmonic proportions of his cheeks.

They kept on like this for almost an hour.

They must have been up to committing the adulterous stuff upon being alone.

Dustin was going to follow them everywhere in order to catch them _in flagrante delicto_ and report back to Quinn.

I accompanied Dustin wherever.

Finally, Dustin's curfew was too close.

Darknes had fallen.

Mark and Maria had gone seperate ways. But maybe they had been noticing us, and they were just trying to deceive us in order to get rid of us?

I better returned to my dorm, anyways.

It was now finally time for going to sleep.

Six girls in a room for three.

This sucked completely.

It wouldn't have been that bad without Stacey.

I hoped for Quinn's bacteria to be identified as soon as possible, allowing us to get rid of Stacey Dillsen.

The niht had been horrible.

Stacey had talked about sassafras tea while sleeping.

I was now going to get nightmares.

But what had happened to Quinn?

Dustin had received an SMS. He read it. 'Bacteria is harmless. Quarantine over.'

I sighed, all relieved.

But Quinn was now convinced of Mark's adulterous actions.

Maria and Mark must have made out past our curfew.

She announced to punish Maria dearly.

'Zap her butt sore with your laser cannon!' I grinned.

A few hours later, Quinn entered our lounge, sighing deeply. 'Darn. I was so wrong.'

I wondered why.

Quinn unwrapped a painting of Mark. 'Mark paid Maria for the painting. It was thought for my birthday. Isn't Mark adorable?'

True was astonished. 'Then the picture can't be really realistic. Oh, Maria could be a great fashion designer, too.'

Quinn shrugged.

Maria was soon going to join team Zoey and True, future titans of fashion design.

But Quinn's stupid jealousy was going to kill her one day — slowly but safely.

**Chapter 21 True Radio**

We, the pupils of the _Pacific Coast Academy_, enjoyed a bit of good music, every now and then.

My favourite was Beyoncé.

Unfortunately it was not possible to let each band perform on our campus all of the time.

But we had a lot of portable electronic devices coming to our rescue.

The most popular among all of them were so-called G.O.s.

The upgraded versions came with the ability of downloading music over wireless connections and save them to a mini-dvd.

Chase Bartholomew Matthews was utterly addicted to those things.

Unfortunately, the new, improved G.O. was not quite cheap, at least too expensive right now for Chase.

He had requested the money for a new G.O. from his grandpa from Baltimore in Maryland.

But what did he get?

It was nothing but an old radio from the times of President Roosevelt!

Chase was bitterly disappointed.

Alas, Ryan had got an idea. 'Why not give it to the electronic club? It will be a challenge for them tuning an old radio into a modern G.O.'

Chase scratched his fluffy bush. 'Hey, Ryan! That sounds excellent!'

Ryan grinned. 'My middle named is "Excellent".'

I gasped. 'Isn't it Leslie?'

Ryan sihed. 'That too … but no boy wants to be named like that.'

I shrugged.

We walked into te office of Mr. Jamisson, adviser of the electronics club.

Chase gave the teacher the old radio, 'may you and your club tune it into a modern entertainment system?'

Mr. Jamisson smiled. 'Hey! Quinn, Mindy, and Firewire will love such a task. Of course we are up to doing that.'

Alas, I feared certain side effects.

Mr. Jamisson took a closer look at the antiquated device. 'Solid work from the thirties … you sure want to get it tuned?'

Chase nodded with hell-bent determination. 'I do want a G.O., no matter what!'

Mr. Jamisson panted. 'OK, it should take us about a month to do so.'

Quinn entered the office in order to give Mr. Jamisson an outline of her latest invention.

Mr. Jamisson beamed while mentioning the new task. 'Your friends want us to rebuild that into a G.O. This should not be hard for someone like you, given your ability of repairing starships and upgrading lawnmowers into racing carts.'

Quinn smiled. 'OK, but it will have its price!'

Chase gasped.

Quinn grabbed my wrists. 'OK, Lu, you are able to play the violin, right? That's the most romantic of all instruments, isn't it?'

I nodded. 'My pen friend Megan says so …'

Quinn panted. 'Mark never kisses me. Lola makes fun of our relationship. If you play some suitable tune for both of us, he will probably do so.'

I shrugged. 'A violin solo in turn for tuning the G.O.? I'm cool with it!'

We high-fived.

A few days later, I played Maurice Ravel's _Boléro_ on the campus.

"Accidentally", Quinn and Mark passed by.

Megan and her oboe would have sounded a whole lot better.

But I gave my best.

Unfortunately, it did not work out.

Mark's grand uncle appeared to have been a violinist. And then he had died.

Mark almost yawned during the whole thing.

Quinn was bitterly disappointed.

Mark walked away.

Alas, our deal was still standing.

Quinn had screwed apart the old thing, anyways.

Now there was no way back.

Two days later, Chase stormed our lounge, holding a letter in his hands. He looked aghast.

I wondered, 'Chase? What's up?'

Chase stammered, 'grandpa Joe wants the old radio back.'

I looked quizzically. 'Sorry, but it's already in the middle of getting upgraded, beyond the point of no return.'

Chase screamed consternated. 'I'm doomed.' He dropped me the letter.

I read through it.

The old radio was now worth around 10k bucks. It contained some rare material, making it a rare objedct for collectors and museums.

This was way more than Chase's bank account.

Quinn confirmed our fears. 'Sorry, that's no longer possible.'

Chase stomped his feet noisily. 'Now grandpa wants 10k bucks for it.'

Quinn gasped. She admitted to having messed it up by welding part of the plastic shell.

Now we needed to gather the money in order to pay the old farter from Baltimore.

Quinn owned a collection of her own toe nails.

Dustin wondered, 'Quinn has got six toes on her right foot, doesn't she?'

I had heard of that, too.

Dustin concluded, 'that's very rare. If people pay an insane sum for some old, trashworthy radio, they should do the same for some stinky nails of sixth toes.'

I wrinkled my nose.

But Dustin was right.

'That's perfect!' I sighed with relief.

Quinn was still brooding about Mark's refusal. 'Am I not attractive enough? Maybe I should trash my spectacles and invent 700 times better contact glasses?'

I grinned. 'Who knows? Maybe he's still into Maria, but doesn't want to admit to it?' Then I suggested her to sell her collection of toes.

Quinn grinned. 'That's brilliant!' She walked to her laptop and launched the interweb conquistador. 'Let's go to the site of _eAuctions_ … here we are!'

I smiled. 'Best offer will make it!'

Quinn nodded solemnly.

We were looking forward to the outcome of the auction.

The week after, an interested customer wanted to see the toe nail collection. He was called Sinjin van Cleef. He arrived Saturday morning on his bike.

The bicycle was adorned with strange spots.

I wondered, 'what is it made of?'

Sinjin grinned. 'The contents of my nose, solidified in synthetic resine.'

I was close to puking.

Quinn smiled when she showed Sinjin her collection.

Twelve-years old Sinjin explained, 'I'm also collecting teeth of relatives of important politicians.'

Quinn shrugged. 'Wow!'

Sinjin offered 2000 bucks. 'I have made that much money with my last painting, using earwax and industrial paint.'

I calculated really fast.

This was by far the best offer.

We had also raised a few funds by selling True's summer collection to Beyoncé and similar activities.

Sinjin's money would finally have been enough to pay Chase's old miser.

Quinn and Sinjin called it a deal.

Fortunately, Chase did never get to know about our ways of raising the last missing amount of bucks for satisfying his grandad. But he enjoyed his new G.O. thoroughly whenever he crossed the campus. He had even downloaded the latest song by Beyoncé and let me listen to it from time to time.

Any side effect of Quinn's invention had not yet been discovered.

But Sinjin was now dating Maria, talking all the time about classic vs. modern arts.

**Chapter 22 True Genius**

I was day dreaming during Mr. Jamisson's lessons about physics.

True poked e awake.

Mr. Jamisson was talking about the effect of heat on bodies.

Some were expanding when heated, others were melting, yet others started burning.

He performed a few experiments. Then he made an important announcement.'Two weeks ago, I have been at the National Science Fair in Chicago.'

I shrugged.

Ryan asked, 'My grand uncle from Chicago has died a few weeks ago.'

I wondered, 'and there is a connection?'

Ryan shrugged.

True shook her head.

The teacher continued, 'this year's winner is Paige Howard from Colorado. She has invented a powerplant like seven hundred times more efficient than those used in most industrial centres.'

True shrugged.

Ryan yawned heartily.

But then there was a surprise.

'Paige is going to visit us and give a demonstration of her power plant,' announced Mr. Jamisson.

We gasped.

Was that a great honour for our school?

Colorado was not just around the corner!

Mr. Jamisson continued, 'True and Lulu, you will take care of Paige during her presence on the campus.'

My heart stood still.

I was totally nervous.

True was thinking about designing some "scientific" outfit, such as shirts with formulae written all over them. She had copied them from Mr. Jamisson's books without understanding anything.

Our technology geeks expected the arrival of Paige Howard with mixed feelings.

It was an honour.

But especially Quinn appeared to envy Paige.

She was apparently a few years younger, but more successful.

Maybe Paige was also going to sneak Mark off Quinn?

In the morning mist, Paige arrived in a cab at the student drop site.

True and I, we had to be up early for that avail.

I was still yawning for lack of sleep.

Alas, I was shocked to no end upon Paige leaving her cab.

She stood suddenly in front of me. But she looked familiar … almost exactly like Megan Parker, my pen friend for over two years!

I gasped for astonishment.

Paige whispered to me, 'yes, Lulu, it's me, Megan Parker!'

I wondered, 'why the fake name?'

Megan postponed her answer unto later.

Viviana was away for shooting the winter collection of some dress vendor in Los Angeles.

For that reason, Paige could occupy her bed.

Thus our dormitory room was not as stuffed as it used to be during Quinn's quarantine.

True being absent, Paige started explaining, 'Josh has always lost out to Mindy and other girls in his science fair.'

I had not known that.

Megan, or Paige, whatever you prefer, continued, 'maybe just because he was a boy.'

I glared aghast.

The fake geek girl continued, 'well, in order to prove that, I am now "selling" his invention. And, as expected, the judges have swallowed the bait, complete with hook, line, and sinker.'

I scratched my chin. 'You do that in order to prove how great Josh's invention is really?'

Megan nodded. 'A loser boob is unbearable.'

I grinned sadistically. 'What a cool idea! But you don't really know about advanced science, do you?'

Megan shook her head. 'Why should I?'

I wondered, 'don't you have to talk and answer questions about your inventions?'

Megan grinned. 'I do, certainly … but there's that little microchip in my ear …' She exposed her right ear.

I looked aghast. 'Wow! So it's really Josh answering all the scientific questions?'

Megan smiled. 'You've got it, Lulu!'

Dustin and his class pals were away with Coco Wexler and Mr. Bender on a camping trip to Yoshemite Park.

Thus I had more time left to care about "Paige Howard".

We walked through the classes.

Megan humiliated about each and every teacher of science, and also Quinn, Mindy, and Firewire, due to "her", i.e. really Josh's, superior scientific knowledge.

For example, Quinn confused geosynchroneous and geostationary orbits.

Mindy thought of Schroedinger's cat, a thought paradox in quantum physics, as a result of advanced genetic engineering.

And on and on and on it went.

Firewire and his pals made even more fools of themselves.

Even Mr. Jamisson had to admit to being stupid.

"Paige" was even able to fix Quinn's malfunctioning anti-gravity generator.

The stupid device had previously destroyed Lola's new cellular phone.

Needless to say, Quinn was totally desperate. She was considering giving up on her career and stuff.

This was no good.

And Mark was not doing anything in order to comfort Quinn. He was such a poor excuse of a boyfriend.

The next morning, Quinn threw half of her laboratory into the giant trash bin of the campus.

This caused a little detonation.

That was enough!

I had to talk Megan into fessing up.

I entered Quinn's dorm, along with Megan.

Quinn was totally grumpy and disappointed. Of course she envied "Paige" to the death.

I told her, 'Paige has something important to say …'

Quinn was too bitter to reply. She wanted to be left alone and die in some dark corner.

Megan started anyways. 'Quinn, I'm not what you think … I don't know anything about advanced physics.'

Quinn did not really want to listen.

Only after half an jour was it possible for Megan to fess up.

Megan explained, 'I'm Megan Parker, little step-sister of Joshuah Nichols. You know him already from the robot wars. He is behind everything.' She removed the microchip from her ear.

Quinn glared aghst. 'What?'

I opened the door.

Josh came marching in. 'Quinn, I'm totally sorry. I didn't want to make you feel inferior and stuff.'

Quinn sighed.

Josh explained, 'it was all Megan's idea anyways, and Drake forced me to go through it.'

Megan nodded solemnly.

Quinn panted with excruciating effort. 'So … it's your invention?' She sighed deeply. She was OK with an older boy having invented all that.

Josh nodded. 'But I've read your sciencce blog for over two years, and you are simply the best and most promising junior scientist, anyways. Confusing a few words amy always occur. The power generator isn't even perfect, there are a few things to work on.'

I suggested them to work on that together.

Quinn hugged Josh heartily. She also trashed Mark on site for Josh.

With Quinn, Josh, Mindy, Firewire, and Mr. Jamisson working together on the generator, it was fixed in no time and worked seven hundreds of times as efficient as before.

Finally, all of Los Angeles was powered by that engine.

* * *

**Part IV  
Fourth Season**

* * *

**Chapter 23 True Legend**

A new year at _Pacific Coast Academy_ had just begun …

Most of us were content with our teachers.

But a few pupils were very much disappointed.

The most horrificient of all teachers was Mr. Hotchins. He was alomst eighty years old and taught economy to high school kids.

Zoey Brooks, Chase Matthews, Logan Reese, Stacey Dillsen, and Michael Barret were in his classes.

He scared the kids to no end.

Legends told us aboyt a guy named Charles Galloway, pupil at _Pacific Coast Academy_ before Vietnam, being scared so hard, making him flee from the campus and disappear and perish in the barren wastelands between Malibu and the Sierra Nevada.

That location was known as Redstone Gulch.

Of course it was only a legend.

Galloway had never been seen again after his flight.

So, how would anyone have conjectured Galloway to have died exactly at Redstone Gulch?

This did hardly make any sense, did it?

There must have been someone knowing more about the end of said pupil …

The book of the corresponding year didn't help much further.

According to Ryan, Mr. Hotchins was a Russian spy.

But this did not help us any further.

At the same time, Lola and Quinn were testing a theory claiming a connection between a boy's kissing prowess and his manner of eating an apple.

Logan and Michael were up to a field trip to Redstone Gulch in order to find the dead corpse of Charles Galloway and prove the legend correct.

Logan hoped to make a movie about it.

Chase and Zoey hesitated, but they finally succumbed to their friends' wish.

Dustin feared a lot for his sister. 'She may get eaten by a vampire, or a ghost.'

I didn't want to believe in vampires or ghost.

They were only mentioned in toons, right?

And during halloween night, they were all but masks and fakes.

True had always been designing a few cool costumes for our Halloween parties.

In order to distract us, I gave Dustin an apple.

Inspite of wearing promise rings, Zoey was still insisting in us refraing from kissing.

But due to Lola's and Quinn's discovery, I was now able to dcheck Dustin's kissing ability. I was totally excited.

It was like Adamm and Eve in paradise, and the snake, and the apple tree, …

My suspense increased indefinitely.

Dustin bit the apple. 'A bit sour …'

I sighed, hoping my lips to be less sour in a few years.

Maybe Lola's and Quinn's assumptions were stupid from the get on.

Anyways, I liked Dustin for his inner qualities, didn't I?

So … bear with it!

Alas, there were still wild coyotes and mountain lions out there.

They weren't really less dangeropus than vampires and werewolves, were they?

All of a sudden, the sky went dark.

A green cyclon appeared in the wastelands.

I started to shiver a bit.

True wanted to comfort me.

Ryan and Pinky were carelessly skating across the campus, laughing all the way.

But there was not so much fun going on nearby.

Unfortunately, Mr. Jamisson wasn't on the campus.

I could not ask him about the possibility of green cyclons.

Meybe they were really ghosts? Or vampires?

I started shivering like aspen leaves in a green tornado.

Oops!

Dustin's teeth started rattling like a venomous snake's tail.

I held him tightly, yet failing to diminish his fears.

Alas, this made me tremble to no end, too.

True chuckled and shook her head.

Dustin screamed upon spotting Zoey 'neath the horizon.

Ryan was verifying this, using Stacey Dillsen's telescope.

Finally, Chase and Zoey reached the campus.

The rest of the kids had chosen a different road.

Zoey told us about the trip. 'We had a hard time finding Redstone Gulch and the tomb. Finally, Quinn's invention made our day. But we were scared whemn fumbling with the tomb. Isn't it bad luck?'

Dustin squealed. He pointed at Zoey's backpack.

Zoey gasped. 'Charles Galloway's locket … how did it get there? I told Logan to leave it in the tomb!'

Dustin's teeth rattled even a huge trifle louder.

I shook my head. 'Logan is nothing but a greedy bastard snitch!'

Zoey nodded solemnly.

After all, Logan Reese was responsible for having upset the green ghost!

We had to return the stolen thing before dawn, or else …

No, things like that only worked in toons.

I was really confused.

At the same time, the green billowing masses started oozing across the campus.

Maybe I should have watched movies like _Fubby the Vampire Staker_[23:1]. That was a real action movie, thus more believable than a toon, or that cool new book about the adventures of Edwin Coulard[23:2].

Maybe garlic worked? Or sacred crosses?

I looked around.

Stacey had dropped some of her cotton swabs for excruciating terror.

I picked up two of them and held them across. 'This will stop the ghost! It's a scared cross.'

True chuckled while still trembling all over, 'sorry … what exactly makes it a **sacred** cross?'

I went pale. 'Dustin, do you know a few pious bible words? You're from good old Louisiana, not from secular New York City.'

Dustin was still trembling and rattling his bones into oblivion. 'Vade retro Satana!'[23:3]

I did not understand it.

But it seemed to work.

The green swirling mass turned into a vampiric bat and flew away, leaving the campus.

I high-fived with Dustin.

But Logan could not get away that easy. He was going to pay dearly for his blasphemic fraud, rigorously at any cost whatsoever.

We were now up to returning the medallion.

Chase walked up to us. 'In the book of Galloway's year, there was also a mentioned a certain Bradley D'Impala from Transsylvania[23:4]. Isn't that the homeland of vampires?'

I gasped.

Vampire Brad D'Impala scared me to no end. He may have escaped, but he was not gone for good, was he? And then he was going to get back at me and Dustin for having banished him.

I had to watch our back!

**Chapter 24 True Customer**

Besides vendor machines, snacks and drinks were also sold in vendor carts.

Of course it was not easy to fix something during those times of the day used by everybody on the campus in order to fix something.

Weird, wasn't it?

Calvin, the coffee vendor, had introduced the _customer of the week_.

One chosen customer was entitled to get free coffee for a whole week, without having to wait in the endless queue.

Many pupils were interested in making that title.

Nobody liked waiting, right?

At the same time, Dean Taylor announced the annual dance contest of schools of the county of Los Angeles to take place at _Pacific Coast Academy_.

I would not have minded participating.

Unfortunately, Dustin had not yet learned dancing.

That was too bad.

We would have rocked together and won a cool prize.

But Ryan and Pinky were like predestinated for the dance contest.

Ryan had recently perfrctioned his backflip and was chosen as the boss of the cheerleaders, replacing beauty idol Kyla.

Said cheerleader queen had some more urgent tasks and could only cheerlead on occasions.

I wondered about these "urgent tasks".

True was goint to the dance with Olivary Biallo, her sewing slave.

I chuckled about her choice.

True poked me rudely.

I sighed with dismay.

True told me, 'am I allowed to teach Dustin dancing, so you may go with him to the contest, too?'

I smiled. 'Why not?'

Tue explained, 'I wanted to make it a last minute surprise for you …'

I gasped. 'So why do you have to spoil such a sweet surprise in advance by asking me beforehand?' I grabbed True, shaking her violently.

True moaned, 'Dustin wanted that. You've been watching the whole mess with Mark, Quinn, and Maria …'

I recalled the secret action.

Quinn's jealousy had turned out stupid.

I sighed deeply. I would have gone through hell for seeing Dustin and True practising without knowing the reason for that.

Oh, that was so unfair …

Why wasn't it possible to have the sweet surprise without the flaming jealousy?

I panted like an awfully tired elephant.

Ryan told us, 'Pinky and I, we are so perfect, we don't even need to practice in order to win the prize with our double-backflip.'

I gasped. 'Wow!'

Ryan nodded. 'I use my time better for becoming customer of te week. And if you girls behave nicely, I will fetch some coffee for you.'

I remarked, 'Dustin may only drink decaf with lots of fat-reduced milk and no sugar, or so says Zoey.'

Ryan shrugged. 'OK!'

I preferred cocoa, anyways, sweet and creamy.

Of course, Ryan was not the only one to try out for the dubious title.

Logan Reese was probably going towin by bribing Calvin.

Michael Barret was certainly going to try to impress Calvin with his athletic endeavour, like pushing the coffee cart around for free.

And on and on and on it went.

Viviana moaned bitterly. 'I wanted to seduce Logan Reese into taking me to the dance contest, and now he's expelled from all extracurricular activities during the next week.'

I shuddered.

Logan gave always reasons enough for getting expelled for good.

But this time, he had dragged Michael into the whole thing.

I was wondering about what to dance with Dustin. I hoped to find some solution for this by watching my favourite web show, _iCarly_.

Carly Shay, a cousin of Megan, was presenting videos about dancing. [24:1]

I loved especially the dance of Samantha Puckett, Carly's best friend and a relative of Pinky, in some Scottish traditional outfit to bagpipe tunes.

Strangely, sam claimed it to have just been a nightmare of that.

So how did it get recorded?

Maybe an invention by Quinn and Mr. Jamisson had been behind it?

I scratched my head.

Finally, the moment of the big dance contest had begun.

Zoey had wanted to participate, too, but her hired partner Jean been run over by Calvin's coffee cart. Now she cheered for me and Dustin.

This happened due to too many boys trying to impress Calvin in order to become elected _customer of the week_.

Chase would have loved to be Zoey's partner for the dance, but his dancing training had been a catastrophe.

I was curious about Dustin's choice.

He had watched _The iCarly Show_ too, being a big fan of that totally new show, and tried to learn from the videos about dancing.

I was totally nervous.

Dancers from many other schools were gathered, such as _Hollywood Arts_ and _Palmwood_.

The umpires scrutinised us contestants very critically.

The first couple were Beck Oliver and Jade West from _Hollywood Arts_. They danced a slow waltz.

Jade always threatened her Beck with an intimidating gaze.

That wasn't going to turn out very well, was it?

After that, Camille Pensky, a cousin of Quinn, entered the dancing floor together with some freakyt bad boy named Wally Dooly[24:2].

That was a catastrophe as well.

They were followed by one Robert Shapiro and his little sister Rexina.

I didn't trust them.

Said Rexina looked much like a doll hastily covered with little girls' clothes.

Alas, Robbie and Rexina argued too much.

This made them dance very poorly.

The umpires had to disqualify them.

The covers fell off Rexina.

The doll was really male, and named Rex.

But this didn't matter anymore.

Finally, only three couples were left: Pinky and Ryan, me and Dustin, and Crony and True.

Crony and True had practised all night long.

Their performance was classic, but not endearing.

Ryan and Pinky impressed everyone with repeated somersaults and backflips, but to which tune?

Right, they had stolen my idea.

They danced to famous highland tunes!

That was so mean.

This way, Dustin and I were left without a snowflake's chance in hellfire.

We had to decide on something else.

Fortunately, Megan had sent us recently a video with Drake and Josh performing at a dance contest.[24:3]

We agreed on switching to that one.

Drake and Josh had been successful with that dance.

And it worked for us as well!

We beamed upon receiving the winner's cup.

Next morning, Calvin decided upon the customer of the week.

After a long suspense, the choiuce hit True Jackson.

We gaosped.

True had not done anything for that.

Calvin explained, 'each week, another cute girl will be chosen for the title, so she doesn't have to wait in the queue, and we may make out …'

True gasped. 'No way! I've already got a boyfriend, Olivary Biallo!'

That was a thorough surprise for most of us pupils.

Calvin shrugged. 'OK, the title goes to Molly Tolbertson.' He switched the icon of his cart.

I sighed. 'There will always be some dumb jerks and even dumber girls to fall for them.'

True nodded sadly.

But we didn't care. We knew what we wanted.

**Chapter 25 True Talent**

Each year, there was a great talent show for the middle school kids at _Pacific Coast Academy_.

I had participated several times without success.

Same was valid for True or Ryan.

Being high school kids by now, we were no longer allowed to participate except for assisting a middle school kid.

This was very sad.

But Dustin showed up. 'Hi, I wanted to participate in the talent show with my new roomie, Robbie "Scooter" Carmichael[25:1] …'

I shrugged. 'Cool, but with what number?'

Dustin sighed, 'oh, I know how to saw virgins into half. But Scooter is such a coward …'

I chuckled. 'Oops …'

Dustin sank down onto his knees. 'Please, be my assistant for the trick!'

I glared clueless.

True remarked, 'Dustin wants to saw you into half!'

Ryan grinned. 'Leroy will be glad to have two half-sisters.'

I screamed and squealed like a chaotic bunch of furies.

Dustin explained, 'it doesn't hurt!'

Ryan nodded. 'A very old trick, and not too difficult.'

I sighed with relief. Of course I wanted to assist Dustin at the talent show.

Very much so!

Alas, the trick was so old and lame, at least according to Ryan.

There needed to be a way to spice it up.

Fortunately, Megan had sent me a video of an event having taken place in San Diego not more than a year ago.

It was about great illusionist Henry Doheny[25:2].

For a few years, his career had been believed to be all but gone.

But Megan had found a way to revive his career with a new trick to be performed with the help of ignorant boobs Drake and Josh in front of _Première Theater_ in San Diego.

The boobs had locked Doheny into an oaken coffin box and perforated that container with several swords.

A medic had diagnosed the death of Doheny.

But three days later, Doheny emerged alive and well from his coffin box at his own funeral mess.

I wondered.

Had Doheny been magically able to deceive the medic?

Had he been actually dead and been raised from the deceased by Megan?

Had he substituted himself magically with someone else's corpse?

Question after question …

The incident with the desert ghost had turned me extremely delicate.

I couldn't help but shiver and tremble, not just for fear, but even more for fascination.

But Megan must have been a witch in order to be able to make him do any of these.

A few weeks ago, I had not believed in witches.

They were creatures only known from toons.

But with the events surrounding Charles Galloway, things had changed rapidly.

Megan was now certainly able to beef up our performance , turning it from a old and lame trick into something as astonishing as the magical revival of "immortal" Henry Doheny.

Too bad Zoey was not going to be present in order to cheer for her favourite little brother. She needed to attend an event at some nearby bookshop.

Her favourite novelist, Jadie Hawthorne, was going to present her latest book.

It was going to be deployed as a movie by Malcolm Reese just a few months later.

Dean Taylor was going to take Zoey downtown. He had got an incredibly cute new car.

But there was quite a bit trouble among the other juniors.

Stacey Dillsen was about building a sculpture for history classes.

Michael Barret had beenn forced to work with her. But he was too impatient for that.

Thus Stacey was looking for someone else to help her.

Upon Stu's inventions, Ryan "volunteered" as said someone. Thus he was not going to cheer for me and Dustin at the talent shop.

This was so incredibly sad.

But at least there was True left, was she?

Jack was participating too.

True was certainly going to back up her cousin.

I asked her.

True panted and sobbed. 'Sorry, but I've got to write my book report about Leonid Tolstoy's _War And Peace_. I've just started reading the book, and stuff.'

I glared at True.

She had never been that messy with her homeworks.

Then I sobbed completely.

Not even Viviana was able to come.

Lola had promised to watch over Bender's toddler.

Mr. Bender had been assigned as a superviser of the show.

But Viviana did not trust Lola. 'The toddler is so going to devastate Zoey's stuff. And I'm going to present it at a local fashion fair. I can't afford to get it spoiled.'

I shuddered with dismay.

Vice Dean Bender opened the talent show.

Jeremiah Trottman was going to broadcast this event.

It couldn't have come any worse.

Trottman started talking a lot.

Leroy and Sandy were the first to perform.

I grinned.

My little brother wasn't really trying to beat me?

OK, I would have been proud of him, anyways, no matter what.

They were going to play a few skits based on Shakespeare's _Much Ado About Nothing_.

Leroy was a big fan of Little Shakespeare[25:3].

They harvested lots of applause.

Next, Jack tried to perform some sort of solo step dance.

Minutes later, it was our turn.

Dustin beamed. He presented an empty coffin. 'My charming assistant Lulu will climb into the box. But will she leave it alive?'

The viewers glared aghast.

Dustin held a large saw aloft. 'I'm now going to saw Lulu into half!'

Leroy grinned. 'Hey! I want my sister back, in one peace!'

But Dustin had already started sawing.

I grinned. 'Aw, this tickles!'

Leroy turned impatient.

Sandy had to calm him down.

All of a sudden, my world went black.

Dustin gasped. 'Lulu?'

Leroy stormed the stage. 'Open the box, now!' He threatened to hit Dustin with something hard.

Dustin bowed to the violence and opened the box.

My head fell to the ground.

But the coffin box was empty.

But the rest of my body was gone.

The viewers were all mad at Dustin, especially Leroy.

All these things I could not perceive.

The very next moment, I stood in one piece behind Dustin. 'Hi sweetie!'

The audience gasped.

Leroy was totally confused. He lifeted up my "head".

It was really a sculpture made by Stacey with True's help.

I hugged Leroy. 'This is really me. No stuffed doll would hug you like that.'

Leroy nodded solemnly.

The audience died for awe.

And nobody dared to refrain from voting for Dustin and his brilliant performance.

In addition, Carly Shay accepted gladly a video of our performance for her web show, the best one ever.

**Chapter 26 True Barbecue**

A few days later, Dustin entered my lounge, grinning strangely.

I wondered, 'what's up, honeybunny?'

Dustin replied in a dry manner, 'my granduncle Morris has just bit the dust.'

I gasped. 'oh, sorry, condolences!' I wrapped my arms around him in a comforting manner.

Dustin shrugged. 'I haven't even known about any such granduncle. And now he isn't any more.'

Ryan chuckled mercilessly.

True sighed. She had seen that coming.

Dustin continued, 'he has left Zoey a truck's load of porkchop. He was apparently the king of his state's meat industry. But Zoey doesn't know what to do with so many ribs. And the meat will rot unless used up soon or stored appropriately.'

I shuddered.

Ryan smiled. 'Pinky's stomach is the best storage for pork! Endless volume! That lies firmly rooted in her family.'

True poked Ryan into the ribs.

Ryan sighed and moaned.

True suggested, 'how about a barbecue contest?'

I smiled. 'Cool!'

Dustin was a bit concerned. 'I'm not allowed to operate a charcoal grill, or any other open fire, on the campus.'

The rules prescribed a miniumum age of 14 for that.

And Dustin was only twelve years old.

Ryan suggested, 'how about a new Gary Coleman Grill[26:1]? No open fire is necessary!'

I smiled. 'OK, Dustin, that would be cool!' Of course I would have worked with him as a team.

Dustin beamed.

Dean Taylor allowed for the barbecue. 'But you need a responsible adult!'

We moaned.

Coco would have been available, and wanted very much to be the judge of the whole contest, but she was hardly to be called responsible.

We went to Mr. Jamisson.

Too bad he didn't understand much about cooking.

Kazu wasn't around that much during those days.

But there was a compromise:

A year before, we had come to know about Coco's sister Evelyn.

And Stu had figured Evvy Wexler to come to Los Angeles for a visit, and in order to try out as a chef for a nearby restaurant named _Vaccaro_.

This way, Evelyn wanted to be closer to her sister.

That was really fantastic!

Such a star cook was a perfect umpire for our contest.

Mr. Jamisson helped us in a different manner. 'OK, Coleman's grill is not very efficient. Along with the science club, especially Quinn, I've increased its efficiency, it's now seven hundred times as powerful as before.'

Dustin cheered.

I high-fived.

Using such a revised and updated Gary grill was way less romantic than a charcoal grill, but a lot safer.

The Wexler sisters were thusly presiding our barbecue festival.

Alas, there had been some troubles in the foreplay of the contest.

Originally, Zoey, Chase, Michael, and Logan wanted to be one team.

But Logan and Michael argued over the traditional Reese meat rub vs. the traditional Barret barbecue marinade.

Chase and Zoey had to split them up.

Zoey and Michael had to build one team.

Chase and Logan were another team.

Logan tried to bribe Evelyn Wexler secretly with hundreds of bucks.

Michael tried to bribe her with a traditional Barret back massage.

In consequence, Evvy had to disqualify both of the teams.

This was very bad.

I had been so looking forward to both the marinade and the meat rub.

They were told to be very hot and spicy, almost like Dustin.

Oops!

Zoey and Chase finally swore solemnly to never be in different teams again.

This was overdue.

At least, Zoey was now helping me with the dips.

Dustin helped busily fine-tuning the taste of the dips. He smiled merrily.

I explained, 'that's tapenade, a French recipe, made of garlic, olives, and capers. And this is a dip invented by my pen friend Megan Parker.'

Zoey tasted. 'Yummy!'

We finally launched our new, improved Gary Coleman grill.

Ryan and Pinky didn't get their charcoal grill start up as fast as they expected.

Ryan sighed. 'OK, I've snuck this from Quinn's laboratory. It is a liquid candle, burning seven hundred times bettern than a standard candle.'

Pinky beamed. She already heard the pork sizzle.

Ryan and Pinky both wanted to pour the liquid into the charcoal.

They agreed on Pinky applying the candle oil.

Ryan was thereupon in charge with the lighter. He illuminated his grill.

Suddenly, a huge flame shot aloft, singing his own and Pinky's face badly..

Ryan's eyebrowes were one.

I chuckled about his misfortune.

True poked me. 'That wasn't nice!'

I shrugged.

True dragged Pinky and Ryan to the nurses' station. She had wanted to participate in the barbecue festival with Olivary Biallo as her partner.

But this venture had to be canceled.

Olivary wanted to offer Evvy and Coco raw meat.

But non eof the Wexler sisters were able to chew it.

Evvy grinned while testing the next ribs.

Stacey's pork chop contained accidentally some cotton swab.

Shuddering with disgust, Evvy shrugged. 'You don't want to know some of the things usually found in the kitchen of six-star restaurants, do you?'

I gasped, preferring to remain ignorant about that.

It was now Dustin's and my turn. We placed the first pork chop onto out Coleman grill.

The device worked seven hundred times as well as a convenmtional Coleman grill.

A few seconds later, the meat was seven hundred times as black as a usual barbecue chop. In other words, it had been turned into one lump of coal.

I sighed for disappointment.

Dustin wasn't feeling any better.

Evelyn praised us nevertheless for our dips.

The next in the row was Viviana, working together with her new friend Maris Bingham, another wannabe supermodel.

Evelyn took a bite. 'Do you want to poison us?' She spat out the chunk of pork.

Coco had no clue.

Evelyn explained, 'the spice mix contains Peruvian power puff pepper, a variant of pepper causing severe kidney failure.[26:2]'

Coco vomited her last three meals off her stomach, staining the ground with a tremendous stink.

Evelyn had to disqualify Viviana and Maris as well.

So, who was remaining?

Evelyn wanted to walk over to the next contestants.

But, all of a sudden, the sprinkler plants started showering us mercilessly. They had been improved tremendously by Quinn, Mindy, Firewire, Josh, and Mr. Jamerson, reporting and fighting fire seven hundred times as fast as conventional ones, across the whole campus.

This made completing our barbecue festival impossible.

Nobody of us had thought of that.

But it was better than getting the whole campus torched off.

We sighed deeply.

Fortunately, _Vaccaro's_ bought the remaining ribs off Zoey, albeit at a huge discount.

But we were still disappointed.

The next festival better had to be a lot better, or else …

**Chapter 27 True Touch**

A few strange things had happened during the following weeks.

Michael and Chase were now regularly conntracted by _Toon Juice_, a site publishing cartoons.

The site had been deemed the worst site ever so far by one Nevel Papperman, author of _Nevelocity_.

Nut Chase and Michael did not care.

Alas, Topher Lane, co-owner of Dingo Channel[27:1], the worst competitor of Malcolm Reese, had objected vigorously to one of Chase's and Michael's cartoons, trying to sue them for plagiarism.

But Michael's second cousin Claire Sawyer had intervened and turned the tide by threatening to sue Topher Lane for abusing Michael's freshly invented word _drippin_, a new slang term denoting _very cool_.

Vivian came back from shooting a commercial for _Blix_.

This was one of my favourite softdrinks.

Vivian had got a few interesting news. 'The _Blix Van_ will come next weekend.'

I shrugged.

Vivian continued, 'Well, you may participate in the _Blix_ game.'

I wondered, 'that's exactly whatr?'

Vivian exoplained, 'the one able to touch the outside of the van longer than anyone else will win a trip with the _Blix Heli_.'

True and I gasped, wondering 'where to?'

Vivian replied, ' a place of your choice.'

True beamed. She wanted to make it to a fashion fair in Paris or Milan.

I was not sure where to go. But I was going to think about it.

In any case, we started practising.

I kept my hand stuck to the closet door for many a minute, holding my books to read aloft with one hand.

But how to flip pages?

According to Megan, one classic pianist once used his nose in order to play a note too far from his fingers.

OK, that was the spirit!

Ryan walked in. 'Lulu? Why too you use your French book as a handkerchief?'

Lulu shook her head. 'I don't. I use my nose in order to flip pages.'

True explained the Blix contest.

Ryan beamed. 'Hey! My middle name is "never loosen your grip"!' He placed one hand onto the wall. 'By the way, do you already know about Quinn's and Mr. Jamison's new project?'

I shook my head.

True did the same.

Ryan explained. 'They are developing a mouth deodorant working seven hundred times as efficient as those for sale in the shops.'

I wrinkled my nose, almost sneezing into my book.

True remarked, 'nice for Quinn!'

Ryan nodded. 'Pinky and I will help by eating lots of smelly stuff and thereupon getting our mouth squirted with her smell killer.'

I puked, unfortunately losing my grip.

Ryan grinned. 'You're out!'

I sighed. 'Dearn, only twenty minutes.'

Ryan cheered for having beaten me. For that avail, he hurled both of his hands aloft.

True sighed. 'Ryan has only made three minutes.'

Ryan Laserbeam was consternated. 'Oops! Oh, I've recently watched a Japanes horror movie named _Shinusha_. A frenzied ninja stabbed his victims to death with chopsticks.'

Fortunately I had already lost my lunch.

Dustin and Leroy would have liked to see the same movie, illegal in most states.

Logan Reese had bought it from Japan.

His dad was making a movie over there.

Logan had also purchased a new Japanese J-phone, able to download more Japanese movies every night.

Unfortunately it triggered fire alerts, and thus activating the improved sprinkling systems.

_Maxwell Hall_ was now thoroughly wet.

Vivian inserted a movie into her portsble DVD box.

I wondered what. 'Logan's phone has been confiscated by chief Becker!'

Vivian explained, 'that's _Dance With Logan_, Logan's hand-made video. There's nothing illegal.'

I sighed.

Why had Vivian still not fessed up to him? Now she started dancing some uncool dances.

Typical Logan Reese!

The day of the van festival had finally arrived.

Ryan and Pinky had just swallowed lots of smelly food for testing Quinn's smell killer.

Alas, it didn't work.

Or maybe that was intentional.

After a few seconds, all of Ryan's and Pinky's neighbours at their side of the van had given up.

This included me and True.

We were bitterly disappointed.

Ryan and Pinky cackled with exorbitant glee.

We had to watch from outside a marked area.

Vivian was on some other side of the van.

Logan had feigned a broken leg and was thence allowed to sit on a chair. upsetting many others, especially Chase and Zoey. He also started coughing at his neighbours, chasing them away.

This way, Vivian was able to move closer and closer to Logan. She waggled her butt subtly in front of the playboy's eyes.

True and I, we coughed for disgust.

Logan just smiled silently . enjoying the attention.

Vician told Logan, 'I would probably use the heli in order to go to some lonely place … just with you!'

Logan beamed proudly. But he did not reply. He was accustomed to being popular among girls, or at least thought so.

Dustin walked uup to us. He wanted Zoey to win. 'Logan is mean. He will probably try to lure her away or lock her somewhere during the break.'

There was a regular toilet break after six hours.

I couldn't help it. I walked away and borrowed a mirror from aforementioned Maria Hughes. I tighed it at the end of a long rod with some string. I whispered a few words into Dustin's ears.

He helped me climb a tree not far from the van.

I held the rod away from me.

The mirror finally bounced two foot above Logan.

The playboy was addicted to watching himself in a mirror.

The windows of the van somewhat reflected his face, but they did so in a very distorted manner.

Logan stood up like nobody's business. He let his hand attached to the van. But he demonstrated not needing the chair.

The piece of furniture was thence removed from Logan.

The reckless jerk followed his mirror image with his own eyes.

Even more, the combination of the reflection and the bouncing movement mesmerised Logan.

Zoey made fun of it. 'Logan, you are now … a dog!'

Logan started barking. He also smelled the scent of fish eaten buy Pinky, just before the contest, in order to test Quinn's smell killer. He started howling. He dropped onto his four limps and trotted around the corner, sniffling at Ryan's and Pinky's mouth.

This disqualified him immediately.

Many hours later, Zoey was the last one to stand.

This made her win the helicopter trip.

Like True, she wanted to go to a fashion fair, and precisely to Milan. Zoey could take someone with her. And she chose True for that purpose.

Unfortunately, they had forgotten some excessively important detail.

Quinn squirted Pinky's and Ryan's mouth with her updated smell killer.

This time, the stench disappeared.

But Ryan and Pinky started laughing like crazy.

Mr. Jamison explained Zoey;s fallacy. 'Helicopters have hardly a reach exceeding two thousand miles. In order to cross the ocean, you'd need a carrier ship's support.'

True and Zoey were consternated.

Their dream of the fashion fair was gone with the wind.

I suggested, 'Zoey, why don't you go somewhere with Chase? Somewhere where you will be all alone but you and him?'

True smiled. 'Yeah, that would be great!'

Zoey sighed. 'OK, I will go with Chase to Yoshemite Park.'

Chase bounced cheerfully around.

Michael gasped. 'There are racoons!'

Chase was still deadly afraid of racoons.

Zoey shook her head. 'you won't be afraid any longer after the trip, I promise!'

Chase was looking for excuses, but he had to give in.

Finally, it was going to be their first occasion to be completely with each other for a whole weekend.

Pinky and Ryan? They are still laughing!

**Chapter 28 True Cupsize**

A few days later, Vivian was totally stoked. 'You won't guess it! But there's a beauty pageant coming to our school!'

I was sitting in my dorm, along with True.

It was already past dinner.

True gasped, 'what?'

Vivian explained, 'Logan thinks of improving his chances to get accepted by a college by organising such an event. He will be the only judge.'

I coughed. 'LOgan doesn't care about college.'

True nodded solemnly. 'He wants to become either a model or an athlete.'

I added, 'or live of dad's bucks for good.'

True sighed. 'yeah, the latter probably.'

Vivian pouted, 'you're so mean!' She sobbed and disappeared.

We sighed. We had certainly not wanted to hurt her feelings.

True sensed a lot of work ahead. 'Everyone will want to participate, wearing the latest fashion cry. So much work for me, Crony, and probably also for Zoey.'

I shrugged. 'Probably. Will you make me something, too?'

True looked at me. 'You want to participate?'

I nodded.

True made me think, 'but Logan is such a jerk, and he's the only judge!'

I pouted. 'Ouch!'

Down in the lounge, I met Dustin Brooks.

He told me, 'I don't understand my sister!'

I wondered why.

He explained, 'she says something like pageants being sexist and discriminatory. But then she participates anyways, just in order to make it to the title page of the new _Buzz_, and be better than Katie Peckerman.'

I gerinned. 'The _Buzz_ is cool … but Logan stinks! And who is Katie?'

Dustin nodded solemnly. 'Aw, Katie is a loose vixen, Zoey's worse competitor during her middle school time. For me, you are the most beautiful ever. Your true beauty comes from within.'

I felt flattered.

Quinn came along. 'I hate tasteless jokes about scientific mistakes. Michael is such a no-brainer!'

I greeted Quinn. 'Will you participate in the pageant?'

The geek girl shook her head. 'But I'm on my way to inventing a new airbag bra. It will be seven hundred times safer than conventional airbags, but only work for girls wearing those bras.'

I grinned.

Quinn continued, 'Vivian wants to be my test rabbit for that one.'

I could imagine why.

Vivian wanted to impress Logan with bigger … er … "balloons".

That was so going to be such an injust advantage!

True had been really busy. She had to design and taylor the perfect swimsuit for Vivian and for many others.

The supermodel had annoyed us to no end with her claims.

Now the wannabe pageant winners stood in a long queue.

I had really thought something better of Zoey than creeping at the feet of Logan.

Dustin was totally disappointed.

He started weeping at my shoulders.

Zoey and Lola walked closely behind each other.

But they were apparently at each other's throat.

Zoey had made both a dress for herself and one for Lola.

But Lola had accused Zoey of being impartial and having given her an ugly dress for the pageant.

Suddenly, the girls from _101 Brenner_ started throwing mud at each other.

This turned very fast into a match of mud wrestling.

Shelby would have enjoyed that more than Lola.

But Logan was upset. 'You are disregarding my authority as an umpire. You are disqualified!'

Many other girls had to be qualified, too, for not listening to Logan's commands.

Much to Ryan's dismay, Pinky was taken out of the contest, as well.

Her new pink dress was totall stained with mud.

Lola and Zoey turned around and threw mud at Logan, making him even more upset.

Vivian came along. 'I'm still in the contest?'

Logan nodded. 'Come thither for the next step. Questions and answers.'

Vivian grinned.

Logan asked, 'what do you think about war?'

Vivian scratched her head. 'War is to be fought, not to be thought.'

Logan smiled. 'Hey, that's a cool answer!'

Vivian smirked. Then she twisted her cleavage, allowing for Logan to see a bit more.

Logan grinned.

Other girls were envious. They snuck up to Vivian and threw her into the mud.

This impact triggered the airbag mechanism of her prototype bra, inflating it even further.

Vivian fainted.

Logan was now going to notice about her cheat.

Even worse, Vivian's chest prependix had already grown to cupsize _E_, and it was still growing.

This was totally uncomfortable.

True and I, we laughed fanatically.

Even Quinn had no clue concerning a way to stop the inflation, barring a good old needle.

But the latter approach would have caused a terrible explosion.

The balloons were now already man-sized.

Viviana was no longer fitting through the doors of the halls.

Logan was absolutely speechless.

There was no decision about the pageant's result made that same day.

Quinn and Mr. Jamison had to tap the bra with a complicated machine and withdraw the stored air slowly.

Over after six hours, Vivian was free again.

Chase had been against the contest to begin with. Now he had a hard time comforting Zoey. 'Probably only losers read the _Buzz_.' He shrugged.

A few days later, Logan sat in a horribly expensive car. In the middle of the campus yard. He was looking for girls to admire him in there. Logan had not yet obtained his driver's license due to having always failed in the test about traffic rules and security. He had bought the care for no other reason than being able to afford it.

Lola and Zoey were horrified.

One girl jumped in, right in order to kiss Logan.

But Vivian followed her and pulled her away. Then she jumped in, instead.

Logan gasped. 'What are you doing here? Is anything on you not a fake at all?'

Vivian sighed. 'sorry, Logan, for that.' She sobbed sadly.

Logan had got a hard time accepting Vivian's accuse. He was going to think about it.

The day after, Malcolm Reese was so upset about Logan's absurd ourchases. He took away Logan's credit card.

Logan was consternated. He had never learned doing without a lot of money.

Vivian snuck up to him. 'Come on, Logan. We could start as auxiliary models somewhere outside Hollywood, and work our way up to the top. We don't need much monet for that, due to our incredible talent for modeling.'

Logan gasped. 'Would you do that for me?'

Vivian nodded sadly. 'Any time, sweetie.'

Logan gasped. Now he was close to weeping. He wrapped his arms around Vivian.

Her bra did not inflate.

Quinn had canceled her product for the time being.

Logan was soon starting to earn his first own bugs as a male model, side by side with his beloved female colleague Vivian.

The _Pacific Coast Academy_ was now going to be a much more peaceful place.

**Chapter 29 True Offers**

A few days later, I met Leroy during the big break in his lounge. 'Have you seen Dustin?'

Leroy sighed, 'he has been called into the admin office during classes.'

I gasped. 'Oh no, has he got into troubles again and is now facing detention?' I sobbed.

Leroy was worried, too.

A minute later, Dustin trotted in.

I was excited. 'What had the evil headmaster done to you? I'll steal explosives from Mr. Jamison and blow up the admin office if …'

Dustin shook his head. 'Mom and dad are here.'

I smiled. 'Good for you. You must be happy to see them even outside the vacations.'

Dustin shrugged. 'Dad and mom are going to London for a job.'

I asked, 'London in England?'

There were probably other cities with the same name.

Dustin nodded vigorously. 'As in endless fog and mist, disgusting kitchen, and idotic accent …'

I sighed horribly.

Dustin continued. 'They want me and Zoey to come with them. We would go to a boarding school named _Covington's_.'

I gasped. 'Cool! Many winners of Pulitzer's prize had been at a prep school abroad.' Alas, I was totally sad about separating from Dustin. I was going to die from missing him.

Dustin continued. 'But we don't have to. Zoey will stay here because of Chase.'

I sighed. 'Good Zoey!'

But Dustin having a choice was a great stumbling block for my conscience.

I did not want him to miss out on a big chance. But I did not want to live that far away from him, either.

Also, Dustin was missing his mother a lot.

Dustin continued, 'So I'll rather stay with you.' He hugged me tightly.

But, hey, there was a possibility to make it together to London.

I sighed. 'Dustin, you remember last year's essay contest. I was in the national finals.'

Dustin nodded solemnly. 'You still have the diploma.' He had helped me a lot after having only made it to the state finals. Thus he was even more proud of my achievement.

I agreed. 'Theprize was more than just a handshake with a senator and a diploma.' I had never talked about it.

Dustin looked puzzled.

I explained, 'it involves a scholarship at one of fifty international prep schools in Europe. And guess which school is among them.'

Dustin gasped. '_Covington_?'

I nodded solemnly. 'But I haven't told you because of wanting to stay with you. And I'd have to convince my parents, and, finally, there needs to be someone to take care of Leroy.'

Leroy sighed. 'Sandy does.'

Lulu chuckled.

Sandy Baldwin had already started wedding plans.

Dustin scratched his head. 'Zoey and Chase may take care of Leroy!'

I chuckled. 'That would be cool.'

True wandered in. 'Hi Lulu! I've already been looking for you.'

Ryan followed a few seconds later, arm in arm with his Pinky Turzo..

I sighed.

Going to England would also separate me from Ryan and True.

This was another reason for my previous silence about the offered scholarship..

Now I had to talk to True about the whole thing.

She was consternated. But a few minutes later, she moaned, 'I will miss you. Ryan will do the same. But it's the chance of your life. Why haven't you talked about it earlier?'

I repeated my reasons.

True sighed. 'We will also stay friends across the whole globe.'

Ryan shrugged. 'I want to go back to my old school in New York City anyways.'

I gasped.

Ryan explained. 'I want to become a clown. Pinky wants to become a professional skater. A renowned prep school, either here or elsewhere, is of no use whatsoever for either of us. And it just wastes dad's money to no end.'

I nodded solemnly.

Ryan and Pinky had just been standing through all the torture in order to be with their friends.

True was hell bent on staying in California. 'Jerry Crony is a truly Californian guy. I want to be with him, and he would wither away anywhere else.' She sobbed.

In other words, the glorious triangle, consisting of me, Lulu, and Ryan, was going to fall apart anyways.

But we were nevertheless going to stay friends.

But we first had to talk our parents into everything.

There I was meeting the parents of Dustin and Zoey fro the first time.

We talked about our situation.

Mr. Brooks smiled. 'I will go and talk to your father, Miss Lulu.'

'Just _Lulu_', replied I.

Mr. Brooks grinned. 'OK, Miss Just Lulu.'

We chuckled.

Mr. Brooks would have wanted Dustin to come with them right away.

But we preferred to wait for the end of the summer break.

This made it easier to convince my parents.

Some patience was necessary.

In addition, moving over the summer break was going to cause a lot less stress than in the middle of the term.

At the same time, Ryan was negotiating with his elder brother Stu. He needed the art student's support for persuading the parents into letting him return to New York City.

For his Pinky, this was going to be much less of a problem.

But we had to wait for their permissions in either case.

Along with Dustin, I watched Zoey and Chase play volleyball.

They were now officially in the school's team.

Suddenly, Leroy rushed up to us. He have us an envelope.

I read it hastily.

Dad had agreed in the plans.

But Zoey was going to take care of Leroy, as promised by her parents.

Zoey and Chase sighed a bit, but they agreed, anyways.

Thence our last week in endlessly sunny California were standing right in front of us.

Our future was covered and hiding in the mists of England.

True and Zoey had ordered picture's of _Covington_'s school uniforms. They were now working on improvements and ready to submit them to the school's board, allowing us to wear enjoyable uniforms.

So we could only hope for a few remaining enjoyable weeks here at _Pacific Coast Academy_.

And the following months were going to be seized by the anticipation of upcomimg junior prom for Zoey and Chase.

**Chapter 30 True Conclusions**

A lot of things happened during the upcomimg term.

During the spring break, the juniors took a camping trip to _Yosemite Park_.

Michael ran away because of his fear of bears.

Mark del Figgalo had got a new girlfriend, Brooke Margolin.

Another new student was James Garrett, tall blond girl-eating nephiew of movie star Jeff Garrett.[30:1]

Not much later, a horse had run away from the stables of aforementioned Fay Dunnaway. It followed Michael all around the campus.

But I remembered that one, Winchester, from my visits to the talking pony.

We returned Winchester on site.

Michael would have gone insane over it due to prior bad experiences with horses.

Not much later, Dustin and Zoey succeeded in a charity walkathon organised by Pinky's mean-looking uncle Carmine.[30:2]. They made twenty miles.

I had bid one buck per mile, thus twenty bucks in total.

Lola Martinez had bid thirty bucks.

We thought those young actresses to have too much money.

But Lola had wrongly understood bids to be for the whole race, not just per mile. Now she was in troubles.

Pinky's family is chock full with criminals and other dubious creatures.

Carmine had always been Pinky's example to live up to.

This explained her nick name.

Pink is obtained by blending carmine with white, thus a less intense version, less mature version of it, like watered whiskey.

But Pinky had been able to dissuade Carmine from calling the henchmen.

The worst event of all was the return of Vince Blake.

Instructed by his staunch little sister Ashley, the reckless bully and jock had succeded in making about everyone believe in being no longer a danger. But he kept on threatening Chase subtly.

Finally, this led to his hitherto anonymous bodyguard coming out.

It was no other than Sarah Kyla, former beauty queen.

This explained her frequent absence from cheerleading practice.

Vince Blake was now expelled again.

Ashley left, too, switching over to _Palmwood_'s.

Michael was not only afraid of bears, horses, and singing in the public, but also of rollercoasters.

The juniors had wanted to go to _Mystic Mountain_ in order to take a ride on the _Spine Twister_ in order to learn more about gravity in Mr. Jamerson's classes for physics.

Logan had abused Michael's fears in order to make fun of him.

But Mr. Jamerson had improved an apparatus used for testing the senses of astronauts.

It was now working like seven hundred times better.

This reduced Michael's fears dramatically.

Finally, everyone was looking forward to the most important event of the year, the junior prom.

Zoey was of course going with Chase. She had designed a wonderful gown and a perfect tuzedo.

Chase hated tuxedo suits, though.

Vivian was Logan's partner for the prom.

They were slowly recovering from Logan's loss of his credit card.

Quinn had invited Josh Nichols, a really crazy dancer.

That was a lot of fun.

Ryan's brother Stu was there in order to be with no other than the one and only authentic Stacey Dillsen.

The latter had made a gown ad a suit almost exclusively of cotton swabs and glue.

Lola was dancing with James Garrett who turned out as a shameless casanova.

He had already been in Seattle and dated our favourite web show host Carly Shay before leaving her and Seattle had over heels in order to try to seduce Zoey.

Fortunately Dustin's sister was not going to give up on Chase for a casanova.

But Lola didn't care, at least not for the time being. She was still hopping from one good kisser to the next, no matter what.

Firewire and Mindy Crenshaw were dancing together, too.

Michael was coming with Addie Singer, a long-time friend of Megan Parker.

Worst of all: The band playing at the prom was a bunch of criminals. They had stolen the drum set from Carly's elder brother Spencer.[30:3].

Dustin recognised the fraud.

We informed officer Garcia[30:4] and got the thieves and charlatans arrested still during prom night.

But this was not bad.

They were thereupon replaced by a band named _Diarrhea_.

The name is disgusting.

But their leader was James Madigan, nephiew of fashion csar Maximilian Madigan.

The second half of the night was very entertaining.

The morning after, Jimmy Madigan reveiled his proper reason for coming to Los Angeles.

True and Zoey were now employed by _Mad Style_ as responsibles for the firm's Californian outlet.

All this made our last farewell from _Pacific Coast Academy_ very hard.

Our plane was standing rigged and ready in the airport. It was going to fly to London the very next day.

We were going to trade endlessly sunny California for the realms of fog, gales, and rain.

But it was going to bring us a lot further to our first Pulitzer's award.

I sobbed when hugging True and Ryan for one more time.

Likewise, Dustin almost dissolved into tears when hugging Zoey once more.

Chase and Zoey were now looking after Leroy.

Not many years later …

As anticipated, we were awarded with Pulitzer's prize for our wonderful report about our life at _Pacific Coast Academy_.

Even more, the award happened to coincide with our wedding day.

We insisted in marrying on the evermore sunny campus, the place of our fist iencounter, Dustin's and mine.

_textbf__The End_

* * *

** 1:1**:

* * *

cf. _True Jackson VP_ : _The Gift_

* * *

**1:2**:

* * *

mentioned casually in the canon, but never portrayed. Name and age can't be inferred from canon.

* * *

**1:3**:

* * *

four cameos in _Zoey 101_, relationship to True is freely invented

* * *

**1:4**:

* * *

named fro J. Farrow, a member of _Schneider's Bakery_ who runs _Zoey 101_

* * *

**1:5**:

* * *

identifies Pinky Turzo from _True Jackson VP_ : _Amanda Hires A Pink_ with Trisha Kirby from _Zoey 101_ : _Bad Boy_

* * *

**2:1**:

* * *

cf. _True Jackson VP_ : _True's New Assistant_

* * *

**3:1**:

* * *

although both Mr. Kirby and Trisha Kirby are from _Zoey 101_, their relationship is freeely invented

* * *

**3:2**:

* * *

spoof off _James Bond_, an action movie which I don't own

* * *

**4:1**:

* * *

identified Rebecca from _Zoey 101_ : _Chase's Girlfriend_ with Trina from _Victorious_.

* * *

**4:2**:

* * *

cf. _True Jackson VP_ : _True Crush_ — here identified with unportrayed, anonymous sister of Lola Martinez mentioned in _Zoey 101_ :_Surprise_

* * *

**6:1**:

* * *

cf. _Drake & Josh_ : _The Guitar_

* * *

**6:2**:

* * *

songs by Drake bell witch I don't own

* * *

**7:1**:

* * *

cf. _Zoey 101_ : _Broadcast View_

* * *

**7:2**:

* * *

cf. _Drake & Josh_ : _Honor Council_

* * *

**7:3**:

* * *

cf. _True Jackson VP_ : _The Rival_

* * *

**8:1**:

* * *

cf. _Zoey 101_ : _Great Vince Blake_

* * *

**8:2**:

* * *

identifies O. Biallo from _Zoey 101_ : _School Dance_ with J. Crony from _Ned__'__s Declassified School Survival Guide_, same actor

* * *

**8:3**:

* * *

cf. _The iCarly Show_ : _iHeart Arts_

* * *

**9:1**:

* * *

cf. _The iCarly Show_ : _iGo Nuclear_

* * *

**9:2**:

* * *

cf. _The iCarly Show_ : _iStage An Intervention_

* * *

**10:1**:

* * *

cf. _Unfabulous_ : _The Rep_

* * *

**10:2**:

* * *

mentioned by name in _The iCarly Show_ : _iKiss_ – actually named after one co-operator of Dan Schneider's

* * *

**11:1**:

* * *

cf. _Ned__'__s Declassified School Survival Guide_ : _New Kid_

* * *

**12:1**:

* * *

cf. _Zoey 101_ : _The Radio_

* * *

**12:2**:

* * *

cf. _Zoey 101_ : _Hot Dean_

* * *

**12:3**:

* * *

cf. _Zoey 101_ : _Paige At PCA_

* * *

**13:1**:

* * *

in _Zoey 101_ : _Lola Likes Chase_ unportrayed — here identified with Wendy from _Drake & Josh_ : _Number One Fan_

* * *

**14:1**:

* * *

same actress's rôle in _Drake & Josh_ : _Megan's New Teacher_

* * *

**15:1**:

* * *

cf. _True Jackson VP_ : _Keeping Tabs_

* * *

**15:2**:

* * *

cf. _Drake & Josh_ : _Sheep Thrills_

* * *

**15:3**:

* * *

cf. _Zoey 101_Quinn Misses The Mark

* * *

**16:1**:

* * *

cf. _Drake & Josh_ : _Paging Dr. Drake_

* * *

**16:2**:

* * *

cf. _True Jackson VP_ : _True Horror_

* * *

**16:3**:

* * *

mentioned in several episodes of _True Jackson VP_

* * *

**17:1**:

* * *

cf. _Drake & Josh_ : _Little Diva_

* * *

**17:2**:

* * *

cf. _The iCarly Show_ : _iFight Shelby Marx_

* * *

**17:3**:

* * *

identifies Sarah from _Zoey 101_ : _Silver Hammers_ with Kyla from _True Jackson VP_ : _Flirting With Fame_

* * *

**17:4**:

* * *

from _The iCarly Show_ : _iLook Alike_

* * *

**18:1**:

* * *

alludes to _Leave It All To Me_, a song by Miranda Cosgrove and Drake Bell which I don't own

* * *

**18:2**:

* * *

mentioned in _Zoey 101_ : _Hot Dean_

* * *

**20:1**:

* * *

surname chosen for same actress's rôle in one episode of _Hannah Montana_, a show I don't own.

* * *

**23:1**:

* * *

spoof off _Buffy The Vampire Slayer_ which I don't own

* * *

**23:2**:

* * *

spoof off Edward Cullen from _Twilight_, another show I don't own

* * *

**23:3**:

* * *

medieval exorcist formula, telling the devil to depart — not exactly a biblical quotation, but similar to _Mark 8:33_

* * *

**23:4**:

* * *

cf. _True Jackson VP_ : _True Fear_

* * *

**24:1**:

* * *

cf. _The iCarly Show_ : _iDream Of Dancing_

* * *

**24:2**:

* * *

cf. _Bigtime Rush_ : _Big Time Bad Boy_

* * *

**24:3**:

* * *

cf. _Drake & Josh_ : _Dance Contest_

* * *

**25:1**:

* * *

identifies Robbie Carmichael from _Drake & Josh_ : _Treehouse_ with Scooter form _Zoey 101_ : _Favour Chain_

* * *

**25:2**:

* * *

cf. _Drake & Josh_ : _The Great Doheny_

* * *

**25:3**:

* * *

from _True Jackson VP_ : _Flirting With Fame_

* * *

**26:1**:

* * *

cf. _Drake & Josh_ : _The Gary Grill_

* * *

**26:2**:

* * *

cf. _Drake & Josh_ :

* * *

**27:1**:

* * *

from _The iCarly Show_ : _iTake On Dingo_

* * *

**30:1**:

* * *

this connection is not madse in the canon. James Garrett is here identifie with Jake Krendle from _The iCarly Show_ : _iLike Jake_

* * *

**30:2**:

* * *

identifies Carmine from _Zoey 101_ : _Walkathon_ with Samantha's uncle Carmine mentioned in _The iCarly Show_ : _iLook Alike_

* * *

**30:3**:

* * *

cf. _The iCarly Show_ : _iAm Your Biggest Fan_

* * *

**30:4**:

* * *

from _Bigtime Rush_ : _Big Time Break_


End file.
